Samurai Zauq Chronicles

Review: Pakistan’s Counterterrorism Strategy: Separating Friends from Enemies

2011-01-07T11:14:00.000-08:00

AYESHA SIDDIQA "Pakistan’s Counterterrorism Strategy: Separating Friends from Enemies" concludes with this statement
"The subsequent sociopolitical anarchy in Pakistan adds to the problem, combining collectively to mean that the United States cannot expect Islamabad to fight the war on Washington’s terms, whatever they may be in the coming months and years."

This is a well written article (as expected) even though AYESHA SIDDIQA narrowly avoids bringing up the Taliban bogeyman that has been the bread and butter of other journalists like AHMED RASHEED. The basic thrust is still the same, Pakistan Army is preoccupied with India (true). It is unfortunate that the third harbingers of dread HUSSEIN HAQQANI has now joined the dark side and is now apologizing for Pak Army actions.

The article is written with a PENTAGON mindset, for example, " The future of U.S. military operations in South Asia depends on the convergence of policies between the United States and Pakistan, but since the war began in 2001, interpreting Islamabad’s counter-terrorism policy has been difficult." There is a feeble mention of the effect of drone attacks (one mention), and no mention of the Pakistan Army losses in morale and life (as much as 5500 have died in Waziristan operations). Hardly a mention of exit strategy and for someone who shows scathing criticism for Pakistan Army, Ms Siddiqa shows tolerance for the US Army 10 year occupation of AF-PAK region.

At the same time, I agree that the starting point for Pakistan is to "address the problem of changing the basic narrative and socioeconomic conditions that drive militancy in the first place." The militancy in Pakistan is a growing threat, a phenomenon that is not restricted to Taliban, but what I term the Biryani Mullahs, the TV evangelists like Amir Liaqat who spew hatred that ends up in targeting and persecution of minorities like Ahmedis, Sufi Shrines and Christians. However, this narrative can't be developed while a war of attrition is launched again Pakistanis population in Waziristan. It should however be launched by banning and arresting any public leaders who spew hatred. In addition, killing of noncombatants and civilians has to be disowned by Pakistani religious established as Ms Siddiqa cites, "A renowned Muslim scholar, Javed Ahmed Ghamdi, argues that unless Muslim ideological theoreticians are able to admit that the Qur’an prohibits killing all non-combatants be they in Israel, Palestine, Pakistan, India, or the United States it will be difficult to fight terrorism successfully."

This has continued to be a Pakistani and Muslim ideological challenge, and becomes increasingly murky because of the presence of US Armed forces in Afghanistan and factors like
a) Frequent Drone attacks in Pakistan
b) Consistent cross border raids by US and Afghan forces
c) Abuse of Pakistani roads, and supply systems by ISAF convoys
d) Loss of Pakistani civilians caught in this cross-fire of Pakistan Army indiscriminate shelling and militants use of civilians
e) Pakistan army's losses

A better assessment of the situation has been by Ann Wilkens, former Swedish ambassador to Pakistan & Afghanistan, in her report called "Smoke gets in your eyes"

(Photo is from Tariq Ali's book, The Duel)

Stop funding my failed state

2009-04-29T17:15:00.000-07:00

Fatima Bhutto wrote an article today asking US to stop funding a failed state.

Another offense has been started by the Pakistan Army at the behest of our liberal elites and American ma$ter$. Gunships, tanks, artillery and probably the use of cluster ammunition. Which begs the question, if the Americans could not dislodge the Taliban from Afghanistan with their professional army and technology, how can Pak Army do that with low morale?

This offense will displace more civilians, the Taliban will merge back into civilian population and reemerge after three months with more vicious treatment of all who don't adhere to their puritanical philosophies.

End result, more civilian casualties, and more hatred from the religious Lizards and more dismay by our elitist peacocks.

The reality is that Pakistan will fall to Islamists in the next decade. The nukes might be dismantled but it will remain a pariah state . . . and our elites will be marginalized and end up living abroad dissociating themselves from the Pakistan regime like the Iranian, Vietnamese and Cuban communities.

Citizens ask Pak army to defeat Taliban

2009-04-27T15:06:00.000-07:00

A letter by Salaman Ahmed of Junoon is being presented to the the President of Pakistan. The letter asks the Pakistan Army to defeat the Taliban. The letter is here

http://pakteahouse.wordpress.com/2009/04/25/appeal-to-the-president-of-pakistan/

This is a bad idea maybe with well meaning intentions. I have already debated this on facebook.

Military action against Taliban will not work. Pakistan Army has fought disastrous campaigns against Baloch insurgency, with MRD in Sindh, with Karachi in MQM and recently in WANA. And lest we forget, a certain insurgency in 1971 in Bangladesh. What koolaid are our concerned citizens drinking? Maybe similar to what israel was drinking when it went to confront Hammas?

Pakistan Army can't stop the Taliban, their ranks don't support the fight. All they can do is create a bigger Humanitarian disaster and more sympathies for the Talib. There are a 1 Million + refugees in Pakistan because of US drone attacks and Pak Army action. Writing letters to one's Army (especially with sordid histroy like ours) is a dangeorusly fascist agenda.

Taliban can only advance into Pashtun backwater areas, there fewer suicide bombs in Peshawar (ANP controlled) and Karachi (MQM controlled). No Army required. Secondly, the US drone attacks have to stop, they cause the attacks on police/Army cantonment in Lahore/Pindi. Third and final, the battle for Pashtun soul is a theological, except our biryani eating mullahs are too scared to confront the Taliban ideology.

South Bay Mobilization had a very good event at De Anza college last Thursday. Coverage here http://karachiphoto blog.blogspot. com/

Insurgencies never die out by force, only by poltical and social will.

Kala Pul North American premiere

2008-11-12T11:23:00.000-08:00

All news out of Karachi is bad

Who: Black Crow Productions and Third I San Francisco South Asian Film Festival

What: Kala Pul – The Black Bridge, a 40-minute narrative by Saqib Mausoof

When and Where: Thursday, November 13^th, 2008, 7:00 pm at Brava Theater

(San Francisco CA) October 23, 2008 -- Witness an authentic representation of three days in the lives the inhabitants of Karachi, a teeming metropolis of over fifteen million and the largest city in Pakistan, a frontline state in the war on terrorism. The film has been reviewed as "Karachi born writer Saqib Mausoof has taken a different route with Kala Pul – The Black Bridge producing results not unlike Satiyajit Ray’s Distant Thunder”

The plot resolves around Arsalan, a fugitive, who returns to his native Karachi, to investigate the violent death of his younger brother, blamed on religious fundamentalists. In the ensuing days he discovers that in a post 9/11 world the gritty megalopolis sits on the fault line of modernity and militancy.

Kala Pul is produced by bay area producer Muder Kothari and was shot in 2006 by Oscar nominated Director of Photography Markus Huersch on location in Karachi, Pakistan. It features the music of Dr Das, founding member of Asian Dub Foundation, Janaka Selekta and various Pakistani ghazal singers. Post production for Kala Pul is done by San Francisco based Zoetrope Aubry productions.

Tickets can be ordered online at http://www.eventbrite.com/event/193281109 or purchased at door for $10.

Additional information at kalapul.com

World Wide food shortage

2008-03-28T16:07:00.000-07:00

Food shortage across South Asia (Pakistan, India, Bangladesh) are common knowledge these days as rising inflation makes it difficult for the average man to buy two meals for his family. My recent visit to Karachi, in took me to a lower income locality where every corner congregation was complaining about food prices, from onions to ghee, from roti to rice.

The knee jerk reaction in Pakistan is to blame government policies, which might be accountable for the massive power shortage, but rather helpless in lieu of the world wide food shortage which have spread well beyond Africa's sub-Sahara region. Two articles by the London Economist on food shortages in Philippines and Egypt present a much more worrying and almost apocalyptic view of the future.

Israel Gaza Policy (No Child left alive)

2008-03-03T11:45:00.000-08:00

The London economist in their usual "balanced view" after a 125 dead Palestinian including 11 children. However, I found this statement rather interesting, is this an under handed smirk at Israel?

"Certainly the Palestinians’ Qassam rockets took an unusually heavy toll on Israel in February, killing ONE person in Sderot"

Read More

Rushdie's Shelter of the world

2008-02-26T10:49:00.001-08:00

Sir Salman Rushdie's new short published in New Yorker. Read

The story started with brilliance but then he shrink wrapped anecdotes from our part of the world into flowery English prose. Add a dash of orientalism, a pinch of eroticism, and his Hobson Jobson of a vocabulary and Rushdie himself becomes Jahanpanna to literature. The compression of the lead character, Akbar, was well represented with the royal 'we', the barbarian ancestors and the mythical Jodha (the perfect wife exists in fantasy?) but the arc of the story vanishes into an oblivion of scrotum scratches.

I still think he is a great writer, a master of his craft, but here he became too lazy to even complete his own fantasy. A disappointing finale, maybe he was impressed by the Sopranos, or maybe he is holding out for a novel.

The Politics of Martyrdom

2008-01-11T09:29:00.000-08:00

This has been a bhari (heavy) year for Pakistan. It started with the arrogance of power of General Pervaiz Musharraf when he dismissed Iftikhar Chaudry as the Supreme Court judge. He was already on a losing streak after the embarrassing death of the former chief minister of Baluchistan, Nawab Akbar Bugti. This 79 year old scion of the Bugti tribe was leading an insurgency against the Pakistan army and was martyred when the cave he was hiding in collapsed during an aerial bombardment. In hindsight, the good General should have retired after publishing his memoir, In the line of fire. He could have settled in California where is son goes to school at Stanford, joined the Hoover institute or be initiated into a Sufi Tariqa. But like Inzimam -- who led an ignominious exit out of the 2007 cricket world cup after the suspicious murder of the national coach Bob Woolmer – for Pakistanis the only graceful exit from power is martyrdom.

This Supreme Court judge (may God save him from martyrdom) first challenged the hold of the Pak military by blocking the sale of the strategic Pakistan Steel Mill to the cronies of the then Prime Minister Shaukat Aziz. His second act was to listen to the cases of the missing persons of Pakistan filed by the Human rights commission of Pakistan. Since 2001, hundred of Pakistanis have been allegedly abducted by ISI and/or CIA. Chaudry Sahab directed the Ministry of interior to answer some of these allegations in court. The fact that Musharraf’s regime was kidnapping Pakistani nationals and selling them as Al Qaida operatives to CIA could have further tarnished the image of the former SSG (Special service group) commando as a lota (sycophant) to the Bush regime.

However, support for reinstating the Chief justice among the Pakistani intellectuals was strong resulting in nation wide protests. In May, the lawyers took their campaign for restoration of the “Rule of Law” to the port city of Karachi. The General had been kind to the city and it was controlled by his political allies, the MQM, a party made up of ethnic Indian migrates. In another hasty move, he gave MQM carte blanche to stop the peaceful protest rally. With permission from their drunken master in London, MQM activist indulged in a chaotic orgy that bought the commerce of the city to a grinding halt. Fortunately, the burgeoning media outlets captured this mayhem on 24x7 news channels and it ended up as another embarrassing episode. In November, undeterred by the three strikes against him, the general imposed an “Emergency”. Journalists were beaten, lawyers were harassed, political activists jailed, human right leaders abused and print and media outlets were banned from reporting. Any remaining fans of the general were dumb founded by this new ruling that made Pakistan appear as a 21^st century banana republic. The General squarely blamed this farce on the rising militancy in the NWFP province and promised to take off his uniform before the end of the year.

To be fair, the war against Pakistan’s Taliban had intensified since the martyrdom of Nek Muhammad by a US Predator in 2004. The Pakistan’s army operation against its own population at the behest of their colonial master had created a monster that had now spread from Waziristan to the idyllic valley of Swat, once considered an extreme golf destination. Qazi Fazlullah's Tehrik-e-Nifaz-e-Shariat-e-Mohammadi (TNSM - the Movement for the Implementation of Mohammad's Sharia Law) is actively engaged in fighting for imposing of sharia, defacing of Buddhist artifacts and beheading of police and army officials. The siege of Red Mosque in Islamabad, where chicks with sticks horrified the whiskey swelling crowd with their religious zeal, was an insight into the new urban female Taliban. Eventually, the mosque was stormed which resulted in the, guess what, martyrdom of its leader, Abdullah Rashid Ghazi. This trend continued in October with a bomb blast in Karachi that claimed the lives of 136 people during Benazir election campaign, and in December at Char Sadda near Peshawar, where a bomb blast during the auspicious Eid-ul-Azha prayers killed 30 people. In the last 40 days of 2007, the frontier province alone has had 28 suicide bomb attacks and it is becoming increasingly difficult to blame “agencies” for these suicide attacks when its own ministers and corps commanders are the main target.

The last bomb blast of 2007 resulted in the death of Benazir Bhutto. Pinki, BiBi, Madam, Martyr had controlled the emotions of my generation with her hairstyles and political gerrymandering. This oxford educated feudal princess from the landed gentry of Sindh was beloved by the nation as a sister and a savior. Her catchy songs, festive campaigning and washmallay dancers send an arrow through the heart of Pakistan. We received her at Karachi airport when she returned from exile in 1987, attended her wedding festivities in Lyari and campaigned for her as she became the first female leader of the Muslim world and the only Pakistani entry in the People magazine’s 50 most beautiful people. Benazir was then, the one leader who could modernize Pakistan as a secular state that was envisioned by its founder Muhammad Ali Jinnah.

Her unfortunate death twenty years later is being eulogized across the world as the biggest blow to Pakistan’s democracy. This is an overstated hype at best. In the last twenty years, out of power and in self exile, Benazir became a Machiavellian politician. Her regular press statements from her mansions in Surrey and Dubai alienated her from Pakistani middle class while making her as the darling of the western media. Calling her legacy complex is apologetic at best. Although during her tenure, private media channels were allowed and the telecommunication infrastructure was upgraded, she did precious little for the country in her two dishonorable terms. She betrayed the progressives on social justice agenda, her husband Zardari aka Mr. 10% amassed a fortune, she empowered General Nasurrullah Babar to fund the nascent Taliban movement and then embarked on a dirty turf war in her power base of Karachi that resulted in months of curfew and thousands of activist been killed in “fake police encounters”. Finally, she lost support of her own mother, Nusrat, and niece Fatima, who continued to blame her for the martyrdom of her own brother Mir Murtaza Bhutto, shot by her trigger happy police during the infamous operation cleanup in 1996.

The cause of her death is being blamed by her husband Zardari on the Pakistan’s covert agency Inter services intelligence (ISI) and lax security. Further fanning the flames of emotional chaos, the People’s Party activist have gone on a frenzy of violence that has not been seen in Pakistan for decades. Trains, hospitals, petrol stations, schools, buses and people have been burned. Hundreds have been killed. Thousands of burned vehicles line the roads in Karachi, the stock exchange has taken a plunge and the damage to infrastructure is in billions. Most Pakistanis are in shock, rumors run rampant through cell phone SMS messages and political leaders are afraid of being targeted. The crisis in Pakistan is exasperated by the fact that there is a power vacuum with Benazir dead, Nawaz scared for his own life, Musharraf without a uniform and Imran khan without a strategy. Nineteen year old Bilawal, who named has just been changed to include Bhutto is a kid, and no where as astute as his 24 year old cousin Fatima Bhutto who reminds many the Benazir of the seventies. Her husband Zardari, the self appointed co-chairman of the party is probably the most despised man in Pakistan.

For all her faults, Benazir remained to her death a remarkably brave woman and a role model to all Muslim women. The fact remains that she was openly threatened by extremists including the top suspect Waziristan warlord Baitullah Mehsud, who called her “an American agent” and boasted of having 50+ suicide bombers in the waiting. Her death on December 27, 2007 at Liaqat bagh in Rawalpindi was probably the result of one such vagrant. It was at this park where the first Prime Minister of Pakistan, Liaqat Ali Khan(Shaheed) was assassinated in 1951, and not far from the jail where her own father Zulfiqar Bhutto (Shaheed) was hanged in 1979 by another martyr of Islam, Zia-ul-Haq (Shaheed), blown to smithereens while flying with the sitting American ambassador to Pakistan, Arnold Raphael (unfortunately just collateral damage) in 1988. Apparently, BB was also fired upon twice before the assassin, blew himself up killing 20 people. Although history might judge her as a failed leader, she will remain in our heart as a martyr to the nation. The challenge to all Pakistanis (and Muslims) is to make sure that the waste of human flesh who blew himself up in this suicide attack is not treated as one.

Oil Spill in SF Bay

2007-11-10T09:29:00.000-08:00

After emergency in Pakistan, it is time to look around where we live. A massive oil spill has hit San Francisco Bay area. Apparently, a tanker named Cosco Busan stuck bay bridge. The coast guard first said that it spilled 140 gallons and later revised to 58,000 gallons. Emergency workers are helping the cleanup around the bay area.

This is not as serious as the Exxon Valden oil spill, or the Karachi oil spill.

The November Plan

2007-11-05T11:22:00.000-08:00

President Musharraf has declared an emergency in Pakistan. I have made a 2 minute video summarizing the situation have a look,

Meanwhile, back at the bat cave

All cable operators & media outlets have been curtailed severely. Satellite and Internet are still open. A record number of mobile messages were sent yesterday. 10/phone.

Supreme court judges have been replaced. CJ Iftikhar is under house arrest.

Lawyers revolt is well under way, but they have faced baton charges.

Thousands of human right activists, politicos have been rounded up (including HR activist Asma Jehangir, Imran Khan and Aitizaz Ahsan)

Constitution has been dumped unceremoniously

US foreign policy is still backing Musharraf

Protests from Benazir Bhutto(PPP) and Altaf Hussein (MQM) are muted

Karachi stock exchange dropped 700 points. Rumors afloat of certain parties were informed of the plan before hand

Rumors of a pro-Islamist army coup that started this are abound ex-ISI head Hameed Gul has been arrested.

The Indians did it - Pak and conspiracy theories

2007-08-28T11:30:00.000-07:00

The economist correspondent writes about Islamabad and Pakistan politics in his post, The Indians did it.

What would we do without this kind of patronizing analysis from globe trotting saviors of the empire? I guess the Brits are still waiting for us to come crawling back to them so that they can save us from the maneaters, Jim Corbett style. I am jealous that he gets to make statements like

- Islamabad is boring (duh, its made for you)
- Pakistanis are conspiracy theorists (maybe he needs to come to American to see Elvis and Roswell)

Still, it is poignant, well crafted and somewhat funny, especially if it is read like Dave Chappell would when he impersonates an older white man.

Sheikh Goma - Muslims can change religion

2007-07-24T11:54:00.000-07:00

Yes, I know Sheikh Goma sounds like a Samurai Lord, but he is truly a wonderful emancipated Sheikh. First he bans female mutilation (which has little to do with islam), now he says, it is ok for Muslims to change their religion, as it is between God and man (also woman).

"The essential question before us is can a person who is Muslim choose a religion other than Islam? The answer is yes, they can," Grand Mufti Ali Gomaa said in a posting on a Washington Post-Newsweek forum picked up by the Egyptian press.

"The act of abandoning one's religion is a sin punishable by God on the Day of Judgment. If the case in question is one of merely rejecting faith, then there is no worldly punishment," he wrote."

More here . Now I am hoping he can make pork halal.

Ninjabans last address

2007-07-10T11:12:00.000-07:00

After the storming of the Lal Masjid, take a listen to this video

It is actually kind of sad . . . . I can imagine the effect this will have on the Army jawans. This is propaganda and myth making at its best. Still, I cannot advocate storming of a religious place, whether it is the Golden Temple or the Lal Masjid by military personnel. My take on this is is that all this is highly convenient for Prez Musharraf, he is back in the good books of his Aqa USA.

An insight view of before this debacle by the Fawzia Afzal Khan, Dispatches from the Frontlines of the Burqa Brigade. A delightful read.

Jadugaran - Persian hip hop

2007-07-09T10:00:00.000-07:00

Inspirational hip-hop with the right intentions. Especially for artists who are interested in using calligraphy. Check it out

Shameless personal attacks of the third kind

2007-07-03T11:01:00.000-07:00

The MNA from MQM Babur Ghair tore Imran to bits about his alleged affair to Sita White and his illegitimate daughter. Watch it on youtube.

He was supported in this shameless act by Ejaz-ul-Haq son of Zia-ul-Haq. All this because Imran khan wanted to ask Altaf Hussein to come to Pakistan and face charges. This is the second such incidence, "after the long arm of the law" of our glorious federal minister of Law.

Here is a write-up. It is very sad . . . personal attacks like this are very disheartening and as Imran said"Ghatiya"

Hinglaj - Pakistan's Hindu pilgrimage

2007-06-27T14:17:00.000-07:00

As the devastating cyclone Yemyin batters the Makran coast and wreaks havoc on Karachi, I found this amazing photo-journey to an important Hindu shrine (Hinglaj is supposedly where the head/sindhur of Sati fell after being dismembered) about 80 miles from Karachi along the Makran coast. It was a reminder to me of the improvised coast of Baluchistan and the strange beauty it still holds . . . .

Karachi violence and the ugly mqm wallahs

2007-05-18T14:34:00.000-07:00

my thoughts and various other have been captured on my friend's ifaqeer, blog

In short, without defending the violence, I would say that treating mqm like 'enemy combatants' flies in the face of all progressive shouting themselves hoarse over Gauntanomo.

The fact that they have hoodlums and are lead by a crazy and vain meglomaniac, does not detract the fact that they are representing Karachi. They have the votes, and are a legitimate Pakistani party. Deal with it . . . politically.

Profiles in Courage

2007-04-17T09:56:00.000-07:00

It is my guilty pleasure to see neo-cons being grilled by a totally awesome lady, in this case Cynthia McKinney, a lowly representative from Georgia.

More in Dynacorp and sex slave scandal.

Cricket at rest!

2007-03-26T16:27:00.000-07:00

Pakistan cricket is always controvertial, its like a non-stop befundling bhangra. The murder of Bob Woolmer after Pakistan's humiliating loss to Ireland has caused a media frenzy in Pakistan, but Mike Marquesee says that the innuendos against the team are in bad taste.

Coach Woolmer might have been a better man then Greg Chappel, but still a bad coach. ICC rankings be damned, Pakistan has always seen its ups and downs, the most important barometer of the cricketing world is the wrold cup and this has been Pakistan's most humiliating exit. Nobody can argue that they have raw talent, and that the coach is mainly responsible for strategy and the team's psyche . . . and in that Bob Woolmer was a failure, as was Greg Chappel.

I think India and Pakistan should eat their humble pie and try to escape the mental depravity that is part of the previous generation that only the Gora Mai Bap can discipline us. I don't know how many Miadad's, Imran's, Kapil's and Jayasurai need to be born for the South Asians to break out from their shared colonial past of insecurities.

So yes, please let Aqib Javed coach Pakistan and maybe take his winning under 19 team to West Indies, maybe they can win us a 20/20. As for my cricket bets, they are on West indies and Sri lanka, becuase they have already overcome some worthy rivals.

No Justice No Peace - SF Anti war rally

2007-01-28T13:02:00.000-08:00

I don't really take my camera to these . . but this time I did. A few picture, more at Flickr.

Big Brother racism

2007-01-19T14:38:00.000-08:00

Some of you might know about the controversy generated by Bollywood Diva Shilpa Shetty's racist treatment on the UK Channel 4 TV Show 'Big Brother'. Apparently she was called a dog, her accent was made fun of, and various other cute little things that bimbos try to do to disguise their racism. Whose fault is it, I believe Shipla's because if you can't take the heat on a reality show, why bother?

But more interesting are the flirts between Shilpa and Dirk Benedict (He played Faceman on A-Team and Starbucks on the original Battlestar Galactica). Aw Shucks . . . so cute ;)

History of Jihad

2006-11-19T22:26:00.000-08:00

An interesting website that is scholarly information for the blatantly biased, History of Jihad. Although these days I unfortunately do not have the time and the energy to devote to this dillusional lunacy which showers us with such quotes as

President Bush with Mongol horsemen. President Bush can as well learn a lot from the Mongols who were the only ones in History to have come nearest to destroy Islam. The failure of the Mongols to do so was due to the fact that although they hated the Muslims, they did not realize that the brutality of the Muslims originated from Islam and eventually the Mongols themselves embraced Islam to become part of the Muslim psyche they so hated to begin with.

Any one who wants to fight the Muslims, needs to understand Islam, and he needs to fight Islam and not just its practitioners Â the Muslims. Or else, like the Mongols, after defeating the Muslims on the battlefield, that leader would end up embracing Islam, and become a part of the problem he started out to unravel.

Key Message, "Don't talk to Muslims, they might convert you . . . meaning Muslims are super cool beings sort of like Vulcans and can do a Jedi Mind Trick on your Christian, Hindu, Jewish,Buddhistt ass to convert you, like they did to the Mongols, and pretty soon YOU would be fighting against the people who have destroyed the world as we know it.

Rushdie is right . . the veil does suck

2006-10-20T11:03:00.000-07:00

An Afghan woman was shot yesterday in broad daylight in Fremont, California. She was 37 years old, mother of six walking her three year old to school after her mini van had broken. She was wearing a Hijab.

I wonder if the guy (yes it was a guy) was inspired by oreoable Salman Rushdie saying 'the veil sucks' or by honorable Gordon Brown saying that covered women makes him 'uncomfortable'.

Police are deciding if it was hatecrime.

My only question is, if you want to 'shoot' someonewould you rather not shoot Foley then a Hijaban?

Schadenfreude for Mighty Heart

2006-10-10T18:13:00.000-07:00

Michael Winterbottom’s shoot of A Mighty heart – The Daniel Pearl story starring Angelina Jolie got shut down in Karachi for not having the right permits. Apparently, the crew members,

“ … ran into trouble in July while filming without permission near Karachi's Village restaurant, where Pearl had planned to meet a contact shortly before his abduction. Officials halted the filming and police and federal agents arrested three Pakistani men - who were wearing police uniforms and carrying guns - for impersonating policemen."

Now the shoot is being held in Pune in India, where the locals have been going ape shit over Ms Jolie’s appearance.

Call me a cynic, but one has to think that westerners have learned nothing about Karachi. Would Michael Winterbottom dare shoot a major production without getting the right permits beforehand in any other city? Seems like he did exactly what Daniel Pearl did, walk into a dangerous and volatile situation expecting everything to be fine and dandy. Mr. Winterbottom is a master film maker with a liberal tendencies, after all he made Road to Guantanamo and given the opportunity he would have made a visually stunning film shot in Karachi.

However, as an aspiring film maker and a native son I would like Karachi to be exposed by us rather then be patronized by Hollywood. So all I can say is Schadenfreude \SHOD-n-froy-duh\ malicious satisfaction obtained from the misfortunes of others.

How to kill Americans (a short film)

2006-10-10T09:15:00.000-07:00

My friend and mentor (Cemendtaur) has done an inspirational piece of work on the Lodi arrests. Please see this very important short documentary. On one hand it shows how the FBI forges ahead with their bullshit and on the other hand, it shows the power of one man's personal Jihad to know the truth.

----The Preemptive War Within; The FBI's Jihad

Reports suggest that after the terrorist attacks on September 11,2001, Attorney General Ashcroft summoned his intelligence people andtold them to do everything possible to prevent further acts of terrorism.

The government started pouring money into anti-terrorism operations,and amongst other efforts, informants were recruited and sent toMuslim communities around the country. These undercover FBI agentswere paid handsomely to produce results.

One such spy went to Lodi, California, and made friends with theinsular, agricultural and working-class Pakistani community in thatrural town. Most of the members of the Lodi Pakistani community were alarmed by the anti-American rhetoric of the newcomer...23- year oldHamid Hayat was not one of them.

The short film being introduced tries to shine some new light on theground realities of the Hamid Hayat case, including a visit toBehboudi, the small village in Northern Pakistan that is Hamid'sancestral home and where, the FBI says, he went to learn...

How to Kill Americans
http://www.youtube. com/watch? v=jq9GyvDN6QI

----Cemendtaur, the artist behind this project and himself born inPakistan, is based in the San Francisco Bay Area. Other work from hispen and camera can be seen at http://KarachiPhoto Blog.blogspot. com; hecan be reached at Cemendtaur@yahoo. com

Has the West been silenced by Islam?

2006-10-05T14:14:00.000-07:00

The current over Mozart's King Idomeneo presenting the chopped off heads of Muhammad, Jesus and Buddha (love the equality) is a bunch of nonsense. On one hand, I really don't give a damn, the artist is using them as a metaphor, BUT, if the Europeans are shouting themselves hoarse over the Islamic black mailing, why is it not ok to have a restaurant in Bombay named Hitler's Cross? Is Jewish black mailing on the holocaust different from Islamist feeling offended by the severed head of their prophet? They are both offensive and in bad taste.

Has the West been silenced by Islam?
In an age scarred by flashpoints between cultures and religions, it is easy to make accusations of prejudice or bigotry. But, argues Paul Vallely, we have all got something to gain from developing new sensitivities (more)

The Next Quivering UN Mouthpiece

2006-09-26T11:55:00.000-07:00

The donkey race is afoot for the next UN Secretary General. Even though UN will still be singing Bolton Supreme, it is obviously a critical position; the top candidates have already been met by the American Jewish Leaders who have sidelined Kofi Annan after he had the audacity to criticize Israel for the death of UN observers. One would think that Israelis could fight their own battles.

The race is being led by a South Korean Ban Ki-Moon who is South Korea’s foreign minister and could be all for capitalistic-jingoistic-globalization. In second place is Mr. Shashi Tharoor, a writer of dubious credentials as an author who is currently serving as a UN undersecretary. I must admit that I have a certain bias for Mr. Tharoor, he is India and therefore will be in the hot seat when it comes to Pakistan, has spoken out against Hindutuva and does possess a certain Nehruian charm about him.

There is of course a quasi-Asian dark horse, a Muslim-Jordanian Prince named Zeid al- Hussein with his blondish hair and aristocratic looks that resemble a crusading knight, who enjoys amicable relationships with Israel. What could be more embarassing for a Muslim to have a Prince represent their abject poverty?
However, I am partial to Jayantha Dhanapala, the top U.N. disarmament official, from Sri Lankan myself. He spoke at the non-aligned conference . . . in Cuba

Dude what are you smoking?

2006-09-05T12:05:00.001-07:00

The Armed Forces Journal, self described as the world's largest publisher of defense periodicals meeting the highest standards of independent journalism, has recently done an article called Blood brothers: how a better Middle East would look. The article written by Ralph Peters, author of many a spy thrillers and op-ed including his latest on Iraq, Dude where is my Civil War, has described a Middle East where the biggest losers are the ‘unnatural states’ of Pakistan and Saudi Arabia, and the biggest winners would be a Free Kurdistan, an Arab Shia state, a greater Baluchistan and an expanded Afghanistan.

The survey starts with noble intentions, that the current borders in the Middle East as “…drawn by self-interested Europeans” and that these “[borders] generate more trouble than can be consumed locally.” Then Mr. Peters support his thesis by exposing the wrongs suffered by the “cheated” population groups, such as the Kurds, Baluch and Arab Shia. Sadly, the Palestinians are not mentioned as a “cheated people”, the Israel Issue is shelved and the collateral effects of the Shock and Awe campaign are ignored.

In the wake of Nawab Akbar Bugti’s death, rumored to be by the American supplied bunker busting bombs used shamelessly by the Pakistan Army, a Greater Baluchistan seems a likely probability. However the vision of a depleted Pakistan as a Punjabi-Muhajir establishment stretching from Karachi to Islamabad (although I would argue that this would include Peshawar) ignores a fundamental issue, i.e. would the Pakistani Pashtuns would like to become a part of a Tajik lead Afghanistan?

Lastly, Mr. Peter dreams of a Kurdistan, “as the most pro-Western state between Bulgaria and Japan” are as deeply flawed as his visions of a ‘modern’ Afghanistan or a ‘democratic’ Arab Shia state. Traveling in the land of Kurds or Tajiks, it is clear that their politics are ultimately patterned by their faith. If Mr. Peter believes that cafes in Diyarbaqar or Baqlan are cheering the pro western democracies for appeasing Israel as Beirut was reduced to ashes then the question arises, Dude what are you smoking?

What a way to go

2006-08-28T18:19:00.000-07:00

Recently two gray beards passed away in a heroic way.

The first Waseem Raja died playing cricket on a green field in England. What could be more awesome then that?

The second, Sardar Akbar Khan Bugti died fighting for a worthy cause he believed in, i.e. a Balochistan insurgency with his grandsons in Dera Bugti.

Both men were personal heroes and had great beards.

Inna Lillahi Wa Inna Illahi Rajiyoun May ALLAH forgive their sins and shame the shameless.

A Humane Final solution for Palestinians by Zionists

2006-08-07T07:40:00.000-07:00

Below is the Israeli(neo-zionists) proposal for peace. Move Palestinian to another country by paying them money!

Why?

1. Analysis of Palestinian deeds and declarations over the years make it difficult to avoid the conclusion that they are in effect both unwilling and incapable of achieving and maintaining statehood.

(a) Palestinian Unwillingness: This is reflected in the fact that the Palestinians have rejected every single viable proposal which would have afforded them a state - from the 1947 partition plan to the 2000 Barak proposals.

(b) Palestinian Incapability: The Palestinian national movement has enjoyed conditions far more favorable than almost any other national independence movement since WW-II - widespread international endorsement of their cause, unmitigated support of a superpower in the decades of the Cold War, highly sympathetic coverage by the major media organizations, and over a decade of Israeli administrations who have acknowledged (and at times even identified with) the Palestinians declared national aspiration. In spite of this, the achievements of Palestinian national movement have been more miserable than almost any other national independence movement – bringing nothing but privation and penury to its people.

More of this farce here
http://www.jerusalemsummit.org/eng/hs_short_eng.htm

The myth of the European media anti-Israel bias

2006-08-07T02:42:00.000-07:00

I am in London and spend all night looking at SKY, BBC and CNN. Their coverage all night was primarily reflecting the killing of Israeli reservists (in uniform) on the way to the front and the three civilians killed in Haifa under the rocket barrage.

This morning they reported the death of 14 Lebanese civilians from Israeli bombing.

I don't think they ignore any deaths, they are in it for maximum effect (with rave style music). While Israeli supporters form the US can read articles from (http://standwithus.org/news_post.asp?NPI=938) Jonathan Cook based in Nazareth writes that it is Israel not Hizbullah that is deliberately targeting civilians (http://www.jkcook.net/Articles2/0268.htm#Top) but this is not mainstream press.

For a centrist view, read The Times of India, a major Indian publication, no friend of the Muslims extremists (remember Mumbai bombings) . . . and they write what the world sees and the world is not on Israeli side but the reason is not anti-semitism but disproportionate Israeli response in civilian death (750 vs 90) and destroying Beirut completely and thoroughly. It is time for Israel to grow up and accept the reality that they are the regional super power and that they lost their underdog(we are fighting for our survival!) status in 1982 . . . except in the US.

In the mainstream US press nobody will touch the special Israeli-US relationship (To Israel with Love), however the London Economist has done a good coverage on this here.
http://www.economist.com/world/na/displaystory.cfm?story_id=7255198

also, for history buffs (and not David Lean's CinemaScope) here is a refresher course on the Suez crisis (also by the Economist, which is most definitely right of center), and how a better American President put a stop to an unjust war, quickly.
http://www.economist.com/world/displaystory.cfm?story_id=7218678

How can liberals fight jehadism?

2006-07-17T17:27:00.000-07:00

Can liberal internationalism be saved? That is the thought provoking question asked by George Packer in his somewhat over intellectualized and emotional assessment in the New Yorker called Fighting faith. In essence, how can a liberal fight Jihadism?

Every imperial power (US) faces potential threats (jihadism); it is a natural corollary of deploying kinetic forces on every corner of the globe. If America does not have the stomach for it, then its days as a traditional imperial global power are numbered. Intellectualizing the threat by liberals is not going to make it disappear. The fact remains that the Pentagon has been working on a forward containing policy called Full Spectrum Domination. All nihilistic damages caused and forthcoming are a result of the struggle against an American hegemony like the one we currently enjoy in North America, i.e. the civilization (or eradication) of the native cultures by enlightening them with western ideals of democracy and capitalism.

The neo cons favorite ploy is to differentiate the isms, this is a completely new enemy, different from fascism and communism, and of course make the current enemy the ultimate Fu Man Chu. The hot counter insurgencies in Iraq, Palestine, Afghanistan (and Chechnya and Kashmir for that matter) are inspired by the call to Jihad (strife in face of overwhelming odds) but claims of Al Qaeda being the glue that combines these movements together are over stated. At one point, the Saudi government, hand in hand with Pakistan’s ISI was funding these movements, but now most of that has dried up. What’s left are career guerillas that depend on chaos and displaced individuals who through personal loss or insult have decided on a path of vengeance, like our favorite Dark Knight. Even more then personal injury, the sense of humiliation is the key driver as these foes mainly stem from an honor driven tribal code of conduct.

I have just finished General Giap's People's War People's Army his doctrine for fighting the French and American forces in Vietnam. In his day Gen. Giap was the Osama, Mahdi, Geronimo, John Brown, Qaddafi or what may you call it. His ruthless efficiency in eliminating anyone who opposed him was exactly what catapulted him to the top in Vietnam. The amazing insight he offers is his understanding of the geo-political reality that he fought under, as opposed to the over intellectualized war that the Pentagon was fighting. America's eventual exit was disgraceful for the Military, but it was a triumph for the American people who kept it real in face of the jingoistic saber rattling. In 2006, 30.3 years later, America’s good will ambassador is Bill Gates and the Vietnamese have forgiven all sins committed by the American killers.

The current theatre of operations against the Talibans, mainly Pashtun tribesman along the Pakistan and Afghanistan border, used to a hotbed of surkhais or Marxists in the seventies. Those were the days when Afghanistan was under Daud Khan's socialistic government and Pakistan's second largest party Awami National Party was led by Wali Khan, son of Badshah Khan. The latter Khan was called the Frontier Gandhi, as he launched a red shirt movement for Independence and transformed the unruly Pathans into a force for passive civil disobedience. Even now, a Marxist inspired movement, the Balochistan Liberation Armyf is fighting an asymmetric war with the Pakistan army in Balochistan. There aim is for a fair revenue share of the natural gas resources of the province which Islamabad has greedily devoured for the last fifty years. Unfortunately, the powers that be, i.e. the Americans, are more interested in Operation Capture Osama, rather then press Pakistan on empowering the locals. Given the geo-political significance of that region, the first order of business should be to make friends and send a message of hope; instead the Pakistan army is fighting an increasingly unpopular war in Wana at the behest of their American masters. One of the tactics employed is straight from the book of the British Raj, flatten seven houses around the house suspected of harboring insurgents. That is a ready made mix for an insurgency, just add Islam.

As for Islamists, left to rot in their own xenophobia they will dry up. However, every action by the US (and Israel) so far has only stoked the flames of anger. Of course, once can’t appease the terrorist, but disengagement is the one method that has proven to be successful in dealing with rebellions, especially when the occupying force are the only real foreign fighters.

Mr Hitchins July 4th Bitchins

2006-07-13T11:09:00.000-07:00

Here we go Mr Hitchens is at it again with his aptly applied generalizations in This July Fourth Ignore polls on America’s image.

Well, personally I can't stand Hitchens. Firstly because once he said something ridiculous like he knows more about Iraq then most Iraqis, secondly he wrote a preposterous article on Ian Fleming in Atlantic Monthly two months back where he called Fleming a perv because Ian defined Bond girl's bottom's as 'boyish'. If Hitchens had lived one tenth of a life lived by Ian Fleming, his sad attempts at humor would have been more appealing. But his pettiness is even more exposed when he took an out of context and cheap shot against George Galloway, his current nemesis by comparing his party to SMERSH (Fleming’s evil henchman society).

Lastly, cause Hitchens like his friend Salman Rushdie (can’t believe I got beaten up in college over that Oreo bastard) supported the war on Iraq not with the Fox style jingoism, which is what it is, but with liberal empathy.

NEWSFLASH for Hitchens, please poll Australians to find out how much they love America, every Aussie I meet when I travel (or maybe I only meet hippie backpacker) bitch about America to the point that now people are saying the world cup referees were especially hard on Americans because the WORLD HATES AMERICA (this from a middle aged Dutch engineer)

I will give you another example that shows the way quotes are generated. Majority of Pakistanis believe that Jews left the building before 911 is probably as true as majority of Americans think that Saddam was responsible for 911.

As for Pakistani's hating Jews, that is a broad statement. Most sane Pakistanis know better, and they are people of the book, the greatest hero of our country (Imran Khan) married a Jewish princess and got little grief over it (they are now divorced and she is dating Huge Grunt) and I personally know many Pakistani friends (note: I did not say I have many Jewish friends) who work with Jews as the cotton apparel industry is dominated by NY Jews who mostly buy from third world countries like
Bangladesh and Pakistan. One friend told me that when they travel they both pray together in the room facing opposite sides of the wall (great movie idea)

Pakistan does not recognize State of Israel, and as far as the state is concerned the word hatred is pretty much dead on. Being non-Arab has nothing to do with it, they grieve as members of ummah (Muslim community) for Palestinians and Israeli antics as the rabid mad dog does not help either. However, there is some positive news with Pakistanis in Israel to promote peace.

Hates groups infiltrating US Army

2006-07-11T11:39:00.000-07:00

Great news, hate groups are infiltrating US Army, or maybe the US Army is just dropping it standards to entice young men to go to combat in an undignified war.

I just got back from Ho Chi Min city, even though I am a naturalized US citizen with contempt for the current administrations policies, I felt oddly embarassed by the pictures of Americans GI's laughing as they held up Vietnamese bodies shredded by American tanks at the War Remembrance Museum and offended by the medals and titles given to the VC war heroe's, 'American Killer hero'

Touring the abandoned US Army bases, I could only think one of one thing, would the Iraqis be shrewd enough to turn the abandoned US army bases into a museum ten years from now?

From Duke Ellington to Daniel Pearl

2006-07-02T20:49:00.000-07:00

What a beautiful post. Wah Wah . . Kaleem Omar writes about the time when Duke Ellington played at Karachi's defunct Hotel Metropole in ‘Nobody in Karachi whistles anymore’

M!am! 7 update

2006-06-28T11:52:00.000-07:00

1. Jon Stewart, The Daily Show on Miami 7:

2. Times News Report (not a liberal magazine by any means)

3. Here's from the delectable marxmail, "On the Sunni side of the street"===================
An excerpt from an exchange earlier today between CNN's Wolf Blitzerand Marlene Phanor, sister of Stanley Grant Phanor, aka "BrotherSunni," one ofFlorida's supposed seven "home-grown terrorists":
Blitzer: Is your brother a Muslim?
Ms. Phanor: No, sir. He's a Catholic.
Blitzer: Does he go to church?
Phanor: Yes, he goes to church. He's a Catholic. We enter St. Mary'sCatholic Church on 75th and Second Avenue.
Blitzer: Is he very political, your brother? Does he have strong politicalviews?
Ms. Phanor: No. I can't really say that.
Later, Blitzer goes on to ask:
Blitzer: Why does the government say he [your brother Stanley Phanor] isalso known as "Brother Sunni"?
Ms. Phanor: They all call themselves 'brothers'. Why, I don't know... butthe whole little group calls themselves 'brother'.
Blitzer: Did you ever hear your brother being called "Sunni"?
Ms. Phanor: Yeah. That's his nickname. It's not "Sunni". It's "Sunny"...like it's a sunny day. Yeah, that's his name.
Blitzer: So the confusion is he was called Sunny and not Sunni... becauseas you know Sunni is one of the religious groups in Islam.
Ms. Phanor: No, I didn't know that but now that I know... no it's not forthat. That's his nickname and it's spelled S-u-n-n-y... as in sunny day.That's his nickname ever since birth....

Salam Bitches . . I met Dave Chappal

2006-06-16T19:59:00.000-07:00

Going to the mosque from work is never easy. I have to take BART at 1:20 and try to be back by 2:30. But today, even though I missed the train, the sermon was by the hoarse whisperer I don't like, I was rewarded by seeing a conversion at the San Francisco Civic center mosque.

So Yeah, it is kind of Awesome. It is powerful, this middle aged guy in a trim goatee repeating after the preacher, there is no God but God and Muhammed is his prophet. Cool, eh, but then I met Dave Chappal.
Yup, I am blessed biaaaatch! He was right there in person, wearing an army fatigue jacket, black T and loose Khakis. Salam Brother. A couple of people recognized him, he shook hands, said Salams. I told him that he has to do a skit as 'Ask A Muslim Dude' and thanked him, as an inspiration as he walked out past the homeless people on the street and the legless hookers in front of Market Street Theater and onto market street. He stopped at the corner as a pretty hijaban took of her Hijab and shook his hand, I left him as other brothers approached him, he shook all of their dirty hands.

..... um um bitches praise be to Allah.

The Terrorist by John Uptight

2006-06-15T19:57:00.000-07:00

John Updike writes the next great American novel, it is called 'The Terrorist' and explores the mind of an 18 year old Mulsim boy named Ahmad and how he becomes a terrorist. On his expose interview with Charlie Rose, he says he is proud of this book, but admitted that he knows next to nothing about Islam and it was a learning opportunity. He then went into an elaborate disposition on the 'desert people's' vision of Paradise. Food, feast, women, wine and Water. yes that would be the same as any Bacchus party and Nordic Valhalla. Oops did I say bitches!

Maybe I should write about a choir boy who got molested by a catholic priest.

The coolest video ever . . .

2006-06-11T08:47:00.000-07:00

Spin DJ is God, Cool music and a great video here.

Pink Floyd Astronomy Domine Review

2006-05-30T09:39:00.000-07:00

Check this review of Pink Floyd in 1967. very funny introspective. ha ha . . . funny I was listening to flying at 33,000 feet over the Dakotas yesterday and watching the fluffy clouds float over the Black lands.

Sala look at the confidence of Roger Waters in 1967. Man he is was always a cocky genius.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=28n28ec3Xus&search=pink%20floyd

More informers, i.e snitch

2006-05-24T14:23:00.000-07:00

Another boy is coerced by informants working to earn their keep from the FBI and the Police. This time it is a Pakistani immigrant who is 23, he earned the conviction after ranting in an Islamic bookstore.

This of course immediately introduces the 'Total Information Awareness' SPECTRE. So much for building bridges with the community, but who cares, I think they are using what the Brits did in London to infiltrate the IRA. What happens when the terrorist start treating the informers like the Palestinians do.

A Mir Jaffar in Lodi?

2006-05-23T11:44:00.000-07:00

So the Lodi Jury has convicted a 23 year old American kid who never finished school beyond 6th grade to 30 to 39 years in prison. Wait, now one of the jurors has said that she was forced into a guilty verdict by the jury foreman.

Still, the father was not convincted, but what remains to be seen is the mysterious desi James Bhund, aka Naseem Khan, who infliterated the farming community in Lodi at the behest of his Company bahadur masters, that would be the FBI. Unfortunately, Mr Bhund was a unskilled fast food worker made up stories about his desire to kill Americans and asked the younger Hyat about sending $4000 dollars to aid the terrorists. He also admitted to meeting Al ZarKawi in a mosque in Lodi. All this because Hamid Hyat had attended a terrorist training camp outside of Rawalpindi, a bustling city of 8 million people, a report denied by Pakistani goverment.

Basim Elkarra, executive director of the Sacramento Valley chapter of CAIR, the Council on American-Islamic Relations, said, "We're shocked. The informant (naseem Khan) lied to the FBI, but he took them too deep into this case, and there was no turning back."

Naseem Khan told the FBI that Osama bin Laden's top lieutenant, Ayman al-Zawahri, lived in Lodi and regularly attended prayer for portions of two years - a statement the government determined was not true.

"Now a poor kid who didn't get past the sixth grade has to spend time in prison," Elkarra said.

This is so full of holes that i would be surprised if it is not made into a stairical comedy with the starring role of Mir Jaffar, the ultimate traitor.

Who are you calling an immigrant?

2006-05-23T11:18:00.000-07:00

Either the Mexicans (and other Latinos) are immigrants to a country called the United States or the U.S. is a Machiavellian power that denies occupying one-half of Mexico for 156 years. Tom Hayden asks the question, more here.

The voice of God

2006-05-19T16:51:00.000-07:00

A rip off on the 10 commandments. Hilarious, the voice of God is Awesome.

What the west needs to know?

2006-05-11T14:34:00.000-07:00

Daniel Pipes latest jihad against Islam. It should be noted that Daniel pipes reads Arabic, which makes about as dangerous and neurotic as most koran spouting fundamentalist. It would be a dream to debate him.

in related new, a Stanford professor of Jewish ancestry, Joel Beinin, has his hands full fighting the neocons Jihad on anyone who sympathizes with Palestinians, Professor fights portrayal as supporter of terrorism

Most of this is done thorough the pro-Israeli monitoring agency called campus watch

Seriously you can't make up this stuff.

Kala Pul - The Black Bridge

2006-04-19T11:15:00.000-07:00

Kala Pul – The Black Bridge, a four act action drama

Friday, May 5, 7:30 PM Mehran Resturant, 5774 Mowry School Road, Newark, CA
Saturday, May 6, 8:00 PM Cellspace, 2050 Bryant St, San Francisco, CA

Who: Presented by FOSA (Friends of South Asia)

Public Info: http://kalapul.info

Contact: For more information contact:
kalapul@gmail.com

Kala Pul - the Black Bridge chronicles cultural, political, and religious conflicts of fictional characters in 21st century Karachi. It is a gritty tale of fugitive Arsalan's return to present day
Karachi after the violent death of his younger brother which has been blamed on religious extremists. In the ensuing four days he discovers that his younger sister has become a successful professional, his younger brother has turned into an extremist and his best friend has
become involved in money laundering. He parties with the Karachi elites, is beaten up by the police, is kidnapped by religious fundamentalists and helped by the catholic minorities. The play is a kaleidoscope on the vibrant cultures of Karachi, described as one of the most violent cities of the world. The title, Kala Pul, is based on a bridge in the city which connects the affluent parts of the city to the lower income area. Arsalan grew up under the shadows of the Kala Pul, caught between the two worlds of haves and have nots, one world of MTV inspired 'burgers' and other of the left behind fodder for the Kalashinikov culture.

The Inconvininet Truth

2006-04-19T10:00:00.000-07:00

Probably the most important film ever made, by the man who invented the internet. Who would you trust more, Gore or the President who denied global warming?

More here

Sharia vs the constitution

2006-03-22T14:04:00.000-08:00

The Muslims are coming, the Muslims are coming, and once they are in, they will make Americans undemocratic. Here is a scholastic research paper equating the Muslim communities in America to David Koresh of Waco Texas fame.

An interview with the Gods of America

2006-03-18T10:29:00.000-08:00

Yes, had one yesterday on St Patrick's Day. Someone asked me what is so special about being an American citizen. My reply. Dissent.

Here is a new report on revenge gone sour. Kind of nice to see AP news service doing something good as operation swarmer goes live. (yes, it is just a project without a QA process)

and anti-war protests rock the world!

Military action in Waziristan

2006-03-11T09:52:00.000-08:00

Please Help Stop the Military Operation and Massacre in Balochistan

Support Rallies to be held in US and Canada to Condemn the Actions of the Pakistani Government

We are deeply concerned by the deteroriating situation and gross human rights violations in Balochistan where the Pakistani Army has started a military operation against innocent civilians. Nearly one-hundred people have been killed, many of them women and children. Here

Why the World is Fearful?

2006-02-24T09:33:00.000-08:00

Why would it not fearful of these crazy Muslims? We kill our own people over humorless 'cartoons' destroy our own historical heritage sites. What a disgrace? I was horrified a few days when John McLaughlin remarked that the 'Moslems' have to clear this poison that is ruining them.

I know all of this can be blamed on the Balfour Declaration, breakup of the Khilafat, the creation and continuous military support of Israel and the two Iraq wars and relentless sanctions that resulted in millions of infantile deaths in Iraq , but . . . when do we take recognize out own follies? The Vatican shames us by asking Muslim states 'What do we do to protect minorities?’

A great homemade video

2006-02-11T11:20:00.000-08:00

Great homemade video synced to U2 Vertigo (Boston to Paris and back)

Now ask yourself what would you make if your kid asked you 'What do you do at work?'

Danish paper rejected Jesus cartoons

2006-02-09T11:10:00.000-08:00

Jyllands-Posten, the Danish newspaper that first published the cartoons of the prophet Muhammad that have caused a storm of protest throughout the Islamic world, refused to run drawings lampooning Jesus Christ, it has emerged today. (here)

So much for freedom of speach. Are we going to get a a cartoon asking how can Virgin Mary be virgin, if she gave birth. Would not the hymen break when a baby pops out. I mean the conception is a miracle but the birth being one is just dumb? Okay forgive me Lord of semetic religions for the batameezi.

Tit for tat!

2006-02-07T15:57:00.000-08:00

This is great . . . Iran has announced a cartoon contest that will ridicule the holocaust. Now we have the battle of insensitivities or Badtameezi. I would fully support this fully if it would prevent innocents being shot dead by their own paramilitaries in Muslim countries. No holocaust or Muhammed blashphemy is worth a human life.

Still more on the freedom of speach in the muslim world . . . Valley of Wolves, Iraq is the most expensive Turkish movie ever made and in it American soldiers in Iraq crash a wedding and pump a little boy full of lead in front of his mother. It stars Bill Zane of Phantom fame. It is the biggest blockbuster for Turkey ever. Reminds me off all the anti-soviet unions that used to come out of Hollywood.

Hail free speach.....

The uproar over Muhammed's caricatures

2006-01-29T17:08:00.000-08:00

A Dutch newspaper Jyllands-Posten is in trouble cause the did a series of cartoons that depicted Prophet Muhammed as a terrorist. Now all limp dick mustachioed Arab countries have decided to withdraw their ambassadors from Denmark. Our ummah has protested the publications of these cartoons more then they did the invasion of Iraq. There collective message 'Please bomb us but don't make fun of our prophet. '

Who cares if the Prophet is shown as a turban wearing ticking time bomb? People treated him much worse and he still passed them with a smile. I think he would have better control over his nafs then we give him credit for, plus Jerry Falwell has already called him a pedophile, which is much worse. This is just anti-semitism from the right. They did the same thing in Nazi Germnay when they showed carcitures of Jews with bulbous noses. And sadly it is not very funny either. 'Stop we ran out of virgins.'

Last year the anti-defamation league caused an uproar of anti-semitism when Egyptian newspapers showed Sharon as the devil. Was that not freedom of speach?

I support the right to draw carcitures that show Muhammed as a terrorist, Krishna posing in an orgy, Jesus caught in a homosexual act, Buddha as a deadbeat dad and Moses as stuttering money collector. Now that would be justice for all.

American War Par Da!

2006-01-28T18:08:00.000-08:00

This music video is made by directed by KP Sasi and based on Kamaan Singh Dhami's anti-war song “American War Paar Da! (Check Out the American War!)”, the 4-minute music video is a satirical but severe indictment of America’s role in escalating world conflict.

It is embarassing and satirical (video here)

Why we fight?

2006-01-27T17:03:00.000-08:00

Check this film out on Why America fights wars? Starts with Eisenhour defining the military industrial complex in 1958 as he stepped down from the presidency.

http://www.sonyclassics.com/whywefight/main.html

Hammas victory

2006-01-27T13:04:00.000-08:00

Regarding Hammas victory in the Palestine authority’s sliver of the land, I have high hopes for democracy, we should let it flourish otherwise it will be yet another hypocritical gesture by the US. We have seen this when the Islamists after winning the majority were deined power in Algeria in 1992 which led to a brutal civil war.

There is a fine line between freedom fighters and terrorists in the third world. It used to be the same way in the first world during the cold war. Hammas victory is good progress, since by participating in elections they have put themselves in the spotlight. If they have a good head they will use this to bargain harder with all parties. Democracy aligning with peace, that is a ridiculous notion, truly democratically elected governments have participated in as many illegal wars of occupation and state sponsored terrorism as non democratic countries. Actually monarchies have not invaded any country for quite some time exception being Jordan and Japan.

The reason for Hammas victory is not because they sponsor ‘terrorism’. It is because they are incorruptible and have invested heavily in a charitable social network that builds schools and hospitals. The Jihadi parties have followed this model in doing relief work in Kashmir after the earthquake. Politics is always secondary to improvised people. Palestinians don't care about Hammas status as terrorists, just like people in Colorado don't care about Lockheed Martin's cruise missiles as long as they provide jobs in the economy.

As for whether a 'terrorist' organization can develop good governance. We have the examples of George Washington and Yiztak Rabbin both described by the British as terrorist, or whatever term was in vogue (savage, marauder, etc)

A few years back, under the strictly curtailed local bodies’ election in Karachi, the Nazim (mayor) was elected from the coalition of religious parties MMA. He did more work for the city then anyone before him and was incorruptible. Last year, we had local body election where the dominant party of my ethnicity MQM participated and won the seat. If they do good, it will only be because of the precedent set by him. I hope that Hammas can do the same, and move out if it is defeated in the next elections.

Hindu nationalist rewriting text books

2006-01-26T13:14:00.000-08:00

Hindu nationalist rewriting text books in Sacramento, California for the state.

The nationalists insist that Aryan Invasion theory is flawed and Hinduism has existed for trillions of years!

the debate rages on, thank God for th eones who oppose them and bought this to attention.

Reason for isreal to be afraid

2006-01-25T13:10:00.000-08:00

Mr. Soffer holds the Chair of Geostrategy at the University of Haifa and has taught for 25 years at Israel's National Defense College, a finishing school for the country's military leaders.

He is one of a group of academics who warn that force of numbers means Israel will eventually cease to exist as a Jewish and democratic state unless it gives up most of the occupied territories with their faster-growing Palestinian populations.

QED :)

Afghans support US presence

2006-01-11T15:05:00.000-08:00

A poll conducted by the Program on International Policy Attitudes (PIPA) at the University of Maryland polled a sample of 2,089 Afghan adults from between November 27 and December 4 from Pashtuns, Tajiks, Uzbek and Hazara communities.

Eighty-three percent said they had a favorable view of US military forces
Eighty-eight percent said they had an unfavorable view of the Taliban
82 percent said having women in parliment is good

Questions text are here in English of course.

It seems that just by having US presence in Afghanistan has propelled the nation into the 21st century, who would have thought that in four years of US occupation, Afghans would discover women's right and fall in love with an occupying power. This poll would have made Goebbel proud.

OK maybe I am cynical bastard, but how about polling the villagers who had family members killed in a remote controlled Predator strike.
Talk about the buffonery of being out of range.

Passing of a great mind

2006-01-09T19:04:00.000-08:00

Qazi Sahab passed today on Dhul-Hijjah 8, 1426, the day of hajj. He was a friend as well as an Uncle who suffered a mental stroke while undergoing heart surgery. It is the curse of our colonized mentality and medical sciences that we allow surgeons to cut open our rib cages with electric saws without a thought to what it would do to a body’s energy flow. He opted for a heart bypass after finding out that his artery was blocked and the esteemed doctors of the OMI clinic in Karachi did a perfectly localized heart operation but somehow they did not consider his body as a holistic system and in their negligence, his blood pressure dropped resulting in a massive brain stroke. In the end, he had blood gushing into his heart, but an empty mind, which is sad, because he possessed an incredible mind.

As a math whiz and had completed all his studies at the top of his class. When the opportunity came for him to clear his final MENSA admission test in Australia his IQ was measured at 185, which should take into account that he was a non-native speaker of English in his late thirties. If I had that kind of a brain, my megalomania would have surpassed most world leaders, but Qazi Sahab had a personal humility that was the hallmark of a Sufi. Again, I don’t mean luddites who eschew technology and use miswaq for brushing teeth so that they can be with the ‘one’, only to be turned away due to periodontal disease, he was a traditional Sufi with utmost humility, a ready smile, the mark from sijda on his forehead proclaiming his as someone who prayed five time on time and a crazy leg spin bowler.

Qazi Sahab came from a middle class family and resided in F.B Area in Karachi. With his numerous brothers, who were all smart resourceful and unconventional, he formed a neighborhood cricket team. Their house was a hotbed of amazing unconventionality. The brothers played cricket in nooks and crannies between alleys and corridors and perfected the art of leg spin with house rules and developed hobbies that resulted in a bicycle powered water pump, calligraphy or a pieced together refrigerator. In a neighborhood filled with middle class mediocrity they challenged the conventions and opted for non traditional professions, one of them became a religious scholar in Australian, another joined Karachi television as a graphic artist, while another became a poet.

Qazi Sahab married my phoppo, my father's sister, in the late seventies. At that time he was an NED graduate who worked at British Oxygen. He was a mechanical engineer by training and a perfectionist who was lovingly referred to as Mr. Plant, since he spent all waking hours of the day working. However, unlike most engineers who are posers (and I know this cause I am one) he was a real professional. He introduced me to the world of quizzes, puzzles, and IQ test. He demonstrated liquid nitrogen to me and once when I was twelve he was about to explain to me how to make a limestone bomb when he stopped, probably alerted by the crazy glint in my eyes.

But enough of my self centered rant, he was something to everyone, to my sister he was the uncle who introduced her to Urdu writers, he mentored my brother as a mechanical engineer to the level that he is now Mr. Plant, to my aunts he was the one with the charming manners, to the children he always came loaded with yummy snacks procured from inner mohallas of Karachi and to his family he was the ultimate father and husband. When were growing up, a lot of us kids made jokes at his expense, he was an easy target cause he was soft spoken and balding, which somehow is induces fits of laughter from twelve year olds. Once when we picked him up from his evening MBA class and passed numerous cinema's with grotesque Lollywood film art, one my cousins in his innocence pointed to a poster and shouted, 'Look a baldy' Without missing a beat, Qazi Sahab looked back asked us, ‘Where?’ We all felt truly embarrassed realizing that he fully well knew of our jokes.

Last November I met him in Karachi for the last time. He had done an umra earlier this year and looked healthy and trim. My last memory of him was in defusing a dangerous situation where my brother was fuming over something catty said to him by an aunt, which incidentally happens a lot in our family. As he left I remember bending down to hug him. Qazi sahib's physical presence was not traditionally impressive. He was just over five foot and did not have the moustache, broad shoulders or the Army bearings of my other uncles, neither did he boast handsome good looks or a domineering intellect. Once during ramzan as my other Uncles vociferously debated on how it was important to greet ramzan joyfully. After dinner, I asked Qazi Shabi for his thought on the subject, as he had not said a word, even though he was the only one who actually prayed five times a day. He just laughed and replied.
'Ramzan is a test. Do you look forward to a test?' I said no, I don't,
'So the same thing for ramzan, you have to do it, but the real joy is Eid not the month of fasting.'

Lastly, it is hard to forget his humility, he was the first one to run any sort of errands in the house and that always made him look less grand. Once some aunt referred to him as ordinary but instead of feeling angry, I had laughed off the idea, because he was a mensa member, an engineer, a sufi and a leg spinner and what would these made up aunties know about any of these things. Off the numerous nuggets of wisdom that he left behind, I remember one clearly. He was an avid reader of Executive digest which always had some management lesson in the back. He showed me one with a picture showing a hand of cards and below it ran this quote from Robert Louis Stevenson,
'Life is not a matter of having good cards, but of playing a poor hand well.'

Qazi Sahab leaves behind one son and two daughters. I hope he finds peace wherever he resides.

Black Bush

2006-01-06T17:38:00.000-08:00

I am in stiches, literaly, laughing at this, this is very funny. Maybe I am just ghetto, but I love this guy, he is my hero. Check this out at Black Bush

(love the random black guy)

Allah made me funny!

2006-01-04T15:48:00.000-08:00

A tradition of humor in islam! These Americans (a South Asian and an African American) are blowing themselves up on stage . . . no really. Check them out, People forget that Muhammed said 'always have a smile for everyone' .
Here is an NPR interview and they are coming to the bay area

21 January 2006, Saturday.
Allah Made Me Funny!
Location: MCA Islamic Center.
Time: 6:00 PM.
Co-sponsored by: MCA Social Committee & CAIR.
Featuring: Azhar Usman, Preacher Moss and Azeem
Contact: For more information, email bayarea@allahmademefunny.com.
Tickets can be bought online at http://allahmademefunny.com/mca/tickets.html

Calling Dr Death

2006-01-03T17:18:00.000-08:00

Seriously, if your name is Gunther Von Hagens, you looked like a Gestapo agent, your father served with the SS and you make an art exhibit out of human corpses called Body Worlds, you must be weird

I mean this seems like a plot for a horror movie. Is this guy for real? I thought Chengiz Khan was mad when he build monuments out of human skulls, but this guy is a corpse artist, but has outsourced his corpses to guess what China!

“Gunther von Hagens, known for his displays of preserved human corpses stripped of skin and dissected, wants to build a laboratory and warehouse in conservative and staunchly Catholic Poland to mass-produce his art”

Omar Khayam's bible for drunkards

2006-01-03T13:14:00.000-08:00

Finally, the Times of London publishes Mehdi Aminrazavi to expose the fallacy and grotesque transalations by Edward FitzGerald’s of Omar Khayyam’s quatrains. Instead of a hedonistic drunkard, we find Khayam to be a man of God and spirtuality, not the deviant soul looking at the world through Shirazi grape juice.

Now if only some scholar would do the same for Coleman Bark's gay (and here I mean the original meaning fo the word) transalation of Maualan Jalauddin Rumi's Masnavi. Here is a good site on translating his original poetry at Dar-ul-Masnavi

An example is here
"Come again, please, come again, Whoever you are. Religious, infidel, heretic or pagan. Even if you promised a hundred times And a hundred times you broke your promise, This door is not the door Of hopelessness and frustration. This door is open for everybody. Come, come as you are."

[accurate translation: "Return (in repentance), return! Whatever you are, return! Even if you are an unbeliever or a Magian or an idol worshipper, return! This court of ours is not a court of despair. Even if you have broken your repentance a hundred times, return!"]

An interesting review on Syriana

2006-01-02T21:22:00.000-08:00

No I have not seen Syriana, but I am an avid follower of Victor Davis Hansen who writes for the National review and is a senior fellow at the Hoover institute at Stanford University in Palo Alto. Yes I quite like it when in his anger and hatred he sputters and spits just like those crazy old terrorists. Michael Moore might be an over the top dramatist, but he hits the nail on the head when he says that the neo cons are angry because they know they will lose to the progressive eventually.

Read it here.
http://www.jewishworldreview.com/1205/hanson.php3

Boycott Muslim Eid stamp

2006-01-02T13:48:00.000-08:00

This is an urban legend that was true. Chain email went around in 2002 protesting the fact that the USPS (US postal service) had issued an Eid stamp. It failed I bought one the other day :)

Dear Fellow Patriotic Americans,

REMEMBER the MUSLIM attack on the World Trade Center on 9/11/01.

REMEMBER all the AMERICAN lives that were lost in those vicious MUSLIM attacks.

...

I strongly urge you to REMEMBER to adamantly and vocally BOYCOTT this stamp when purchasing your holiday stamps at the post office. To use this stamp would be a slap in the face to all those AMERICANS who died at the hands of those whose religion this stamp honors.

Orhan Pamuk on Trial

2005-12-20T15:01:00.000-08:00

Yes, Turkey's greates novel writer, of Snow and My name is Red fame, Orhan Pamuk is on trial for slandering the modern republic. he had the balls to suggest that upto a million Armenians and 30,000 Kurds have been killed by Turkey since the fall of the Ottaman empire, and nobody talks about it. More here

Reminds me of how in Pakistan there is still no acknowledgement of the brutality with which our Army suppressed the local population in East Pakistan, i.e. Bangladesh.

Karachi Back on the map

2005-12-16T15:19:00.000-08:00

I have just visited Lahore made a remark to many friends about the unbelievable air quality in Karachi. Most don't believe me, but knowing that y'all are hopelessly colonized, here is an Englishman's perspective, Andrew Miller dairy after Pakistan thrashed England by 165 run in Karachi.

"One of the first things you notice about Karachi, so long as you're not being hot-boxed in a rickshaw as the morning traffic crawls to a halt, is the improbable clarity of the air. Despite being home to 14 million intensely active inhabitants, there's none of the oppressive smog that lingers over Lahore like a caggy blanket. As the sea breezes work their magic and dissipate the city's exhaust fumes, it's possible too to see through some of the thick layers of misconception that abound about the place." More here

Misquoting Jesus

2005-12-15T16:56:00.000-08:00

I heard this on NPR's 'Fresh Air'. Mr Ehrman a leading theologian, although now he confesses to be an agnostic, explores how scribes -- through both omission and intention -- changed the Bible.

The most interesting segment is the revelations between the Book of Mark and the Book of Luke. Apparently in the former, as Jesus was being crucified he asked God, 'Why have you forsaken me?’ In Luke however, this was replaced by 'Father forgive them for they know not what they have done'. The Jesus that come sout from the Book of Mark is disposed to getting angry very quickly and is definitely a rebel, living out in the wild and hanging out with provocateurs (a 19th century word for terrorists). Last but not least the concept of the Holy Trinity (the father, the son and the holy ghost) did not exist in the Greek versions of the Bibles (which are the oldest), but was introduced by the Roman catholic church and was subsequently included in the English translation known as the King James Bible.

More here Misquoting Jesus

Meditation alters brain structure

2005-12-07T11:25:00.000-08:00

Scientists and the Dalai Lama have confered. Meditation enhances brain structure and slows brain detoriation. The study subjects have been Budhist monks.

I wonder if namaz, calligraphy, painiting and knitting have the same benfits.

Brown people dont laugh!

2005-10-28T09:47:00.000-07:00

The latest effrontery. A new 'independent movie' by Warner Brothers is hilarious enough for me to chew razor blades.

It is called 'Looking for comedy in the Muslim world' A Jewish comedian (their reference not mine) is sent by the US government to find out why the Muslim world hates our guts. So they supposedly sent him to India and Pakistan, except he ends up in Dehli, India, talks to a lot of ladies with Bindis, makes lame jokes about Gandhi and about how there are no comedians in Iran, except to blow themselves up. I saw the trialer but could not catch a reference to Pakistan and most jokes are played on the helpless Indians as Sitar music plays out in the background.

The best solution is to have a rival screening on the opening day of the movie with skits from 50/50, Alif Noon and Angan Tera.

This is the sadistically the biggest blow of them all. This is clearly saying 'brown people don't laugh. Oh well, its their loss, we get to enjoy both George Carlin and Moin Akhtar.

Chivalry today

2005-10-27T12:10:00.000-07:00

In the good old days of chivalry, it was standard practice of the victors to let the opposing losing side collect their dead in peace. Not so any more. The Few (only 250,000 or so), the proud (absolutely), the Marines have retorted to burning the body of Talibans, referred to as 'enemy combatants'. While the bodies of these evil doers were burned, the solider taunted them as 'cowardly dogs'.

All this occurred to me as I saw 'Kingdom of Heaven', a choice representation of futuwa and chivalry by the Crudader Knights. Ahhh . . . the good old days.

A more realistic perspective on the Marine is Anthony Swofford’s riveting book on the first Persian Gulf War, Jarhead which has been made into a movie. He describes the US marines as ‘Welcome to the suck’

Relief Items requested

2005-10-25T10:04:00.000-07:00

Medicine's required

Supplies required

First Aid kits
Bandages
Gauze
Splints
Injections
Canellas
Drips -Saline
Anti-tetanus
ORS
Cough syrups
Hydrogen Peroxide
Anti-biotic Cream
Pain Killers
Diarrhea Medication
Adhesives
Scissors
Tweezers
Soap
Plastic Bags
Blankets
Tents –preferably non-flammable
Canned Goods
Can Openers
Powdered Milk
Plastic Sheets
Torches
Ropes
Axes
Shovels
Whistles
Brooms
Good shoes
Candles
Matches
Tissues
Bottles Water
Water Purifies
Cooking Utensils
Cutlery
Crockery
Warm clothing

Earthquake Efforts

2005-10-25T09:43:00.000-07:00

Tsunami Disaster 2004 South Asia Earthquake 2005
Died: 150,00 Died: 100,00
Displaced: 1.5 Million Displaced: 3.3 Million
Funds raised: $10 Billion Funds Raised: $630 Million

Some excellent sites for earthquake info

Earthquake 2005

Pakistan Earthquake
http://aopp.org/eq.htm

Center for International Disaster Information
http://iys.cidi.org/disaster/pak.05j08/

Risepak
http://www.risepak.com/

Response to Mr. Cleese Letter

2005-10-14T13:21:00.000-07:00

A response from a friend who is a real patriot. Bravo!

Dear Mr. Cleese,

Thank you for your incisive, particular and patronizing letter. We wouldn't expect anything less from a representative of our former beloved and benevolent colonizer.

You may have read that not all of us elected our dear leader. But it's not in a pissy former-colonialists nature to see the subjects of their colonies for their diversity, is it? So to make it easy for you, I will retort as a unified American, as ironic as that is. We hope you understand. We wouldn't expect anything less from a representative of a culture that puts irony and "wit" at a higher premium than content. It's as if somehow, by putting a clever imaginary verbal glue between two pair of underpants you think not only have they become a beautiful coat, but that Mr. Bean donning said coat and swishing about is the highest form of internationally accepted entertainment.
The Queen Mother, you say? Fantastic! Mother, indeed. What a bunch of sluts and freaks roaming through her home. Jerry Springer, indeed.

We prefer your parliament anyway. We will in fact arm you to disband Congress and Senate. Your parliament is more than American enough for us anyway (sans the wigs). There is name calling, drunkenness, shoving. We like those guys. (Could use a couple dykes, though.)

We have some problems with Tony Blair, but we will accept him as he has always been a bottom to us. We would like to continue spanking him. He has a pretty mouth (a rare condition in the state of modern British dentistry).

While it's true that we are blissfully ignorant, close-minded and nation-centric, we find it strange that you, the British, would use this as a criticism. Remember when you all decided to venture forth and see how big exactly the world was and tried to turn all the world into a manufacturing plant and "burra" of your own, making sure that all the little blackies and brownies of the world served you roast beef-headed, boiled cabbage-haired, big-paunched, bad-teethed, uppity tricksters with white gloves?
Yes, I said "you all." We have decided that is a friendly and useful phrase in the language you are desperately trying to make irrelevant in the modern world, and we will continue its use. Good thing you won't understand what it means when you do take us "back" over and we swear at you under our breath, recreating the long history of undetected swearing that has floated around your cloudy heads, drunk on SHERRY (which should only truly be used in cooking as it is NASTY), as the so-called natives gave you a piece of their native minds in their native tongues and you hurrrumphed your way on through you day. Soldier on!

Look up these words, why don't you, fella:
Snooty
Hypocrite
Twitty (as opposed to "witty," which is an adjective, not a religion)
Titanium (you can have al-you-min-ee-yum)
Oh, and I guess you would criticize (or "criticise?") us for our use of Z. Let's take a look at Z words:

Zaire. You were too busy fucking up elsewhere to notice when the Belgians (doing more than just your deeply analyzed potato products) borrowed your specific techniques to "steal" the stealing of the natives' lands from your grasp. You stayed back in

Zanzibar, which you colonized until 1963, the same year JFK was assasinated? You want a history lesson about that fucking year? You think WE are hiding something?

Zebra. Did you know there used to be colored zebras? They became extinct during your rule in colonial Rhodesia. Another brutal attempt for you to ensure that the world exists in only your black and white.

Zee. Oh, by the way, "zee" is older than "zed," in YOUR LANGUAGE. Before the US existed, btw. Even "izzard" is more noveau than "zee," but that's also French, and the one thing we do agree on is not to impersonate the French under any circumstances.

George Eliot. There is a great quote about British disdain for Z by George. Then again, SHE was PISSED off at having to PRETEND SHE WAS A MAN TO WRITE, so we give her a break for criticizing the Z. Her quote amounted to the assertion that Z was added to the end of the alphabet, not as a useful letter, but as a separator between the real letters and the ampersand. We understand your fear of the concept, "last." We understand the concept of afterthought is difficult for you, existing in a world in which you, now, are always a has-been.

Speaking of misogyny, what's up with the suggestion our athletes play with "girls?" Our WOMEN kick your women's ASSES. BTW, it is impolite to call adult females "girls," particularly when they are KICKING YOUR ASSES. Oh, and that's right, our women ESPECIALLY kick your asses at SOCCER, even though according to you, none of us know what that is.

Thanks for talking to Microsoft. In Seattle. Washington. USA.

PLEASE don't try to ensure we distinguish you from the Australians. Your transparent attempt to ensure NOBODY remembers you 1) DISCARDED your "trash" on that continent; and 2) you dumped them VIOLENTLY, AGAIN on a colony of until then self-sustaining natives is both disingenuous and, well, silly. And not silly in a "Mr. Bean just got caught again picking his nose when really it was a super glue incident" way.

Hollywood called to refuse your request about casting Brits as good guys. They are too effeminate.

We are not going to sing a song asking God to save the Queen. If you weren't out colonizing for the last 300 years maybe she wouldn't need all the help.

We do not, however, and officially, argue with your criticisms of our uses of guns, the metric system, weak "lager," lawyers, therapists, inferior cars, inferior tea, things "nuclear," etc. Fair enough. We would like to bring up a few recent incidents to help you further this anaylsis inward:

- Shooting of unarmed Brazilian dude in the TUBE you thought a terrorist.

- Last night's high frequency of puking inside pubs due to over-consumption of "strong" beer even though pubs close at, like, 5 pm or, like, whenever.

- We think it funny you criticize our lawyers vs. your SOLICITORS.

- Most of us don't go to therapists. You watch too much TV.

- We have no response to cars, tea and "nuclear." We agree with you. We don't actually drink that much tea.

Thanks again for your criticism. We love it. It's like tickling us, and shit, like totally awesome when you are our spanking puppet, and, like, we are like laughing hilariously while you are tickling us with your little nancy feathers! We don't actually think any of your criticisms are unwarranted, we just wish they came from one of the other 6+ billion people on this planet that have a legitimate reason to make those complaints, and, specifically, like, not from you.

Love,

The, like, US of frizzzeaking A.

John Cleese's Open Letter to the US :)

2005-10-14T12:58:00.000-07:00

John Cleese's Letter to the USA
To the citizens of the United States of America,

In the light of your failure to elect a competent President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective today. Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths and other territories. Except Utah, which she does not fancy. Your new prime minister (The Right Honourable Tony Blair, MP for the 97.85% of you who have until now been unaware that there is a world outside your borders) will appoint a minister for America without the need for further elections. Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire will be circulated next year to determine whether any of you noticed. To aid in the transition to a British Crown Dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect:

1. You should look up revocation in the Oxford English Dictionary.

Then look up aluminium. Check the pronunciation guide. You will be amazed at just how wrongly you have been pronouncing it. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'favour' and 'neighbour', skipping the letter 'U' is nothing more than laziness on your part. Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut' without skipping half the letters. You will end your love affair with the letter 'Z' (pronounced 'zed' not 'zee') and the suffix ize will be replaced by the suffix ise. You will learn that the suffix 'burgh is pronounced 'burra' e.g. Edinburgh. You are welcome to respell Pittsburgh as 'Pittsberg' if you can't cope with correct pronunciation. Generally, you should raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. Look up vocabulary. Using the same twenty seven words interspersed with filler noises such as like and you know is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication. Look up interspersed. There will be no more 'bleeps' in the Jerry Springer show. If you're not old enough to cope with bad language then you shouldn't have chat shows. When you learn to develop your vocabulary then you won't have to use bad language as often.

2. There is no such thing as US English. We will let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take account of the reinstated letter 'u' and the elimination of -ize.

3. You should learn to distinguish the English and Australian accents. It really isn't that hard. English accents are not limited to cockney, upper-class twit or Mancunian (Daphne in Frasier). You will also have to learn how to understand regional accents - Scottish dramas such as Taggart will no longer be broadcast with subtitles. While we're talking about regions, you must learn that there is no such place as Devonshire in England. The name of the county is Devon. If you persist in calling it Devonshire, all American States will become shires e.g. Texasshire, Floridashire, Louisianashire.

4. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as the good guys. Hollywood will be required to cast English actors to play English characters. British sit-coms such as Men Behaving Badly or Red Dwarf will not be re-cast and watered down for a wishy-washy American audience who can't cope with the humour of occasional political incorrectness.

5. You should relearn your original national anthem, God Save The Queen, but only after fully carrying out task 1. We would not want you to get confused and give up half way through.

6. You should stop playing American football. There is only one kind of football. What you refer to as American football is not a very good game. The 2.15% of you who are aware that there is a world outside your bordersmay have noticed that no one else plays American football. You will no longer be allowed to play it, and should instead play proper football. Initially, it would be best if you played with the girls. It is a difficult game. Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which is similar to American football, but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like nancies). We are hoping to get together at least a US Rugby sevens side by 2005. You should stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the 'World Series' for a game which is not played outside of America. Since only 2.15% of you are aware that there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable. Instead of baseball, you will be allowed to play a girls' game called rounders which is baseball without fancy team strip, oversized gloves, collector cards or hotdogs.

7. You will no longer be allowed to own or carry guns. You will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more dangerous in public than a vegetable peeler. Because we don't believe you are sensible enough to handle potentially dangerous items, you will require a permit if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public.

8. July 4th is no longer a public holiday. November 2nd will be a new national holiday, but only in England. It will be called Indecisive Day.

9. All American cars are hereby banned. They are crap and it is for your own good. When we show you German cars, you will understand what we mean. All road intersections will be replaced with roundabouts. You will start driving on the left with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion tables. Roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour.

10. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are not real chips. Fries aren't even French, they are Belgian though 97.85% of you (including the guy who discovered fries while in Europe) are not aware of a country called Belgium. Those things you insist on calling potato chips are properly called crisps. Real chips are thick cut and fried in animal fat. The traditional accompaniment to chips is beer which should be served warm and flat. Waitresses will be trained to be more aggressive with customers.

11. As a sign of penance 5 grams of sea salt per cup will be added to all tea made within the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, this quantity to be doubled for tea made within the city of Boston itself.

12. The cold tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer at all, it is lager. From November 1st only proper British Bitter will be referred to as beer, and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as Lager. The substances formerly known as American Beer will henceforth be referred to as Near-Frozen Knat's Urine, with the exception of the product of the American Budweiser company whose product will be referred to as Weak Near-Frozen Knat's Urine. This will allow true Budweiser (as manufactured for the last 1000 years in Pilsen, Czech Republic) to be sold without risk of confusion.

13. From November 10th the UK will harmonise petrol (or Gasoline as you will be permitted to keep calling it until April 1st 2005) prices with the former USA. The UK will harmonise its prices to those of the former USA and the Former USA will, in return, adopt UK petrol prices(roughly $6/US gallon - get used to it).

14. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that you're not adult enough to be independent. Guns should only be handled by adults. If you're not adult enough to sort things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist then you're not grown up enough to handle a gun.

15. Please tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us crazy.

Tax collectors from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all revenues due (backdated to 1776).

16. Last but not the least, and for heaven's sake.....it's Nuclear as in clear NOT Nucular.

Thank you for your co-operation and have a great day

John Cleese

The Wrath of Khan

2005-10-13T17:37:00.000-07:00

While the world sympathizes with the tragedy in Pakistan, the Atlantic Monthly’s esteemed journalism has a cover story on The Wrath of Khan.

How A. Q. Khan made Pakistan a nuclear power—and showed that the spread of atomic weapons can't be stopped

Mr. William Langewiesche opens his article with heart warming imagery of a beautiful lake, something he probably observed from the air conditioned confines of Mercedes as he was whisked away with Police escort, then he continues on the corruption of the Islamic state, the greed of the Dr. Strangelove aka Dr. A.Q. Khan, the pollution of Rawalpindi, a city close to the devastating earthquake, and his observation that A.Q. Khan is considered a demigod (how little he knows about Pakistan).

He writes (and the ‘u’ after ‘q’ is his because God darnit that the way God intended it to be), ‘…Dr. Abdul Quadeer Khan, the metallurgist who after a stint in Europe had returned to Pakistan in the mid-1970s with stolen designs, and over the years had provided the country—single-handedly, it was widely believed—with an arsenal of nuclear weapons.’

Now wonder of all wonders, when James Bond ‘steals’ it is called spying. When the US smuggles secrets from Cuba, USSR and Egypt it is not stealing, when the British MI6 Cambridge ring gave away cold war secrets it is spying. But if a Pakistani brings back centrifuge design to compete with a legitimate enemy, who was ‘given’ the nuclear technology under a program called ‘Atoms for peace’ by President Eisenhower, then he is stealing.

Nuclear proliferation CANNOT stop while the US builds burrowing nuclear bombs. Mankind will end up destroying the world if we continue building these devices, but how can the US expect sovereign nation to accept their please and threats when they keep building up their own armament.

The article has one motive. In short,
‘You brown people should not have a nuclear bomb, only we can have the bomb, why don’t you do some civil disobedience, dance a Bhangra, teach us Yoga, and cook us some Chicken Tikka Masala.’

Logical analysis will only predicate that the country most likely to use a nuclear bomb will be
a) one that has many
b) one that has used one before
c) one that has participated in more wars than any other in the last 60 years
d) one that continues development of nuclear, biological, chemical and cluster bombs, napalm and air-fuel bombs
I wonder what country that would be?

Tariq Ali and more comments

2005-10-13T16:28:00.000-07:00

Tariq Ali laments on why were the US, German and British forces in Afghanistan not mobilized to save lives after the earthquake

Pakistan will not forget

and more comments from home

'Things are depressing in Pakistan, media is cashing in as its something new for them. We never really had these channels to cover anything in Pakistan and now we have 5 news channels on the earthquake 24/7. Every wannabe is on TV asking for donation and FM 89 is selling wrist bands to all the burger kids who weren’t already wearing one.

First time, I have seen people come together in Pakistan the way they have now but at the same time people in Karachi need entertainment and sadly all the relief camps are being used for entertainment and poondi. The last place you would expect a relief center to be would be Lecole School in Phase 8.

The Pak-jawans are sitting idle and are not involved in any activities at these camps in Karachi as Pak-burgers have completely occupied the territory.

Anyway, I think I am being about things. People are really trying and getting together to help and that’s what really matters. We donated a bunch of water, dates, milk, blankets, etc. We hired a Suzuki to transport the stuff the second day of the quake, so the things were still a little saner. We volunteered to Pack medicines and stuff the initial two days, and then it just got too crowded and crazy.'

OPEN appeals for helicopters

2005-10-13T16:26:00.000-07:00

With the worst affected areas in northern Pakistan remaining largely inaccessible, the ONLY way to get humanitarian and medical aid and heavy equipment to these earthquake victims is through air drops using helicopters.
Pakistans most critical need remains helicopters to carry aid, heavy equipment and search and rescue teams with K 9 dogs. Please call President Bush, thank him for the 8 helicopters he is sending, but request him to send at least 50 more:

President Bush:
E-mail: president@whitehouse.gov
Phone: (202) 456-1414
Fax: (202) 456-2461

Please also contact your Senators & Congress persons with this appeal. You can get there contacts at: http://www.congress.org/congressorg/home/

Sample letter here

www.opensiliconvalley.com

Remarks on the 7.6 tragedy

2005-10-12T10:32:00.000-07:00

The unofficial toll is now around 40,000. I am depressed after talking to friends and family in Pakistan. A few things struck me about the disaster, the fact that entire villages have disappeared in tragic.
The creeping cold and freezing rain is going to hamper the relief efforts as Kashmir settles into winter. The panic of Karachites as the coastal city and Balochistan were hit by low intensity tremors, and of course the Muhib-watani of my nation. As a US resident, I am destined to miss both tragic and joyous moments. I missed the 1992 Cricket World Cup Win, the devastation of Karachi during operation cleanup in 1992, the bloodless coup of Gen/President Pervaiz Musharraf in 1999 and now the one time where the nation is united and working together. I wish I was there to do some good for once. But I just blog . . .

Some quotes from friends,

'Karachi is going nuts with the whole relief work for the earthquake. It’s good to see that, other than the burgers there for poondi and rolling around smoking up.'

'We are so engrossed in magnifying our silly problems and there comes a catastrophe .....a real eye opener ....this is what we need a shiver from the earth and every thing can just vanish ... it is unimaginable destruction, generations are destroyed .....I cant forget the eyes of a 3 yr old who was rescued after 3 days ...they were stoned ....black holes .....although it is the time when the country needs youth , a lot of I know are going with rescue teams to the affected areas'

'Yaar the relief effort is going on but the damage I am afraid is way too much, way too much. Although, when I was at the PAF camp in Karachi yesterday I saw a true depiction of national spirit so this has really brought the awam together...'

'I wanted to share an eye witness account of the situation in Kashmir from my sister who was stationed there with her husband.
They were located northeast of Muzaffarbad near the LoC where their ADS and home were on the slope of a mountain overseeing 3 or 4 villages in a valley surrounded by tall mountains. They were inside their home at the time the earthquake struck at which time their entire home; ceiling and walls just fell on them. They did not even have time to move. Both of them were buried under the rubble while the earth shook violently. My sister first and then her husband managed to crawl out of a small space where they could see some light. Both of them sustained injuries including fractures and cuts, however not life-threatening, Thank God. When they got out, in her words, the entire landscape & geography of the area had changed. The hill that usually was in front of them was no more and large chunks of entire mountain ridges, cliffs and tops were falling down on to the valley. There was a huge split in the earth directly ahead of them. If the loud sound of moving and falling mountains wasn’t devastating enough, they looked down in the valley only to see huge amounts of rubble. None of the structures in the villages (houses, schools, mosques) were there any more. As injured people started to reach them by foot, it was clear that at least 85-90% of the civilian population in that area had perished (approximately 3000-4000 people)'

And lastly our illustrious MNA Aitzaz Ahsan, deplores the US for sending eight helicopters when it has a thousand stationed in neighboring Afghanistan and the Saudi’s who have a fleet of 10,000 of which not a single one was send and lastly the refusal by the Army to use Indian helicopters.

After thoughts on the quake

2005-10-10T10:46:00.000-07:00

First and foremost, apologies for my sarcastic bitchy posting on the morning of the disaster. The US has spared eight helicopters and $50 million dollars now the full extent of the disaster has become known and Kuwait's has signed up for $100 million.

It is sad and tragic, the people who suffered most don't have much to spare as is, and landslides probably accounted for most of the dead. My heart especially goes out to the students of Shaheen High school who are still trapped in rumble. But it is the greatest natural disaster to hit Pakistan? I would have assumed the Bhola cyclone that hit East Pakistan, now Bangladesh would have qualified for the worst with up to 500,000 people dead.

Also, what would all the fundamentalist Mullahs says now, the one’s that were goading over the disaster in New Orleans. See how Allah punished American for the invasion of Iraq. What would be the rational for this? There can only be two that I can think of. Pakistan is being punished for supporting America, or for abandoning the Kashmir’s freedom struggle. A faint hope in my heart when I heard about the disaster was that maybe for once my countrymen (and women) would pull together and embark on a shared vision and justice for all.

In any case, here are the main charity organizations that are collecting donations for the Earthquake victims. Hidaya Foundation and Islamic Relief

US response to earthquake in Pakistan

2005-10-09T11:10:00.000-07:00

A deadly earthquake hit Pakistan yesterday. 20,000 dead in Kashmir. Entire villages have disappeared. The US has promised $100,000, yes you heard me, that's right, a full $100,000.

I am awaiting the Kuwait response, they gave a 100 million to Tsunami victims and 500 million to Katerina victims (by the way can anyone tell me how many lives were lost there, I can't seem to find a single news source that can say how many people died because of Hurricane Katerina in New Orleans).

Finally, here is the true American reponse to the chaos in Pakistan after the earthquake. On Yahoo front page, one day after the earthquake.

S. Asia Quake Hits Area Where Osama Hides

I tell you the Duke would have been so disappointed with this pettiness.

Osprey unleashes hell on mosques

2005-10-05T10:10:00.000-07:00

Seems like Boeing and Bell are apologizing to the Muslims. No, no, not for the tons of weaponry (cluster bombs, laser guided bombs, missiles, etc) they nonchalantly drop on ‘foreign fighter’ (they of course are native to Iraq). They are apologizing for an ad in the Sept. 24 issue of National Journal, a political-affairs publication, depicts U.S. special operations troops rappelling out of a CV-22 Osprey built by Bell and Boeing in an assault on a mosque.

"It descends from the heavens. Ironically it unleashes hell," reads the ad's headline. The caption shows marines landing on a mosque which read ‘Muhammad Mosque’. If it was a advertisment, it would probably mimic Russel Crowe's famous line from Gladiator, 'At my command, unleash hell'

What is more ridiculous, Bell apologizing for a stupid ad, or the Muslims protesting over a dumb photo as Boeing build weaponry unleashes hell everyday in Iraq.
Article here

On Mr. Rushdie

2005-09-30T11:41:00.000-07:00

I have been hearing a lot of praise for his new book Shalimar the Clown. I will definitely be reading it.

I have been a fan of Mr. Rushdie's work, but he has been a disappointment as a person. While Satanic verses used great metaphors, it was too confusing as a work of prose to be put in the same category as Midnight Children, Moors Last Sigh or even Shame. However, all of these are great novels. I think Haroun and the sea of stories is a beautiful work of art and the Jaguar smiles always bring a smile to my face.

However, Mr. Rushdie has a self destructive streak and he has goaded himself on his vanity and greed. As a Muslim, I did not find anything particularly offensive in Satanic Verses, but what I did find is his callousness towards his family living in Karachi (a few blocks form my residence). I also find his support, with his friend Christopher Hutchins, for war in Iraq unforgivable, because this is the same guy who wrote so beautifully about the Nicaragua tragedy in the Jaguar Smiles. He is the one who wrote about how it feels to be a third world denizen and see the foot come down. But then he just sold his lot with to his latte sipping intellectual friends. He lost his chi long time ago. Now he is just a sad clown.

Lastly, although he has gone so far as to say that all good literature from South Asia is written in English, and has made a career of making fun out of Indian English idioms (Speed Thrills but Kills), I have never heard him speak a word of Hindi/Urdu/Kashmiri in his lectures or book signings. In the end, he remains the last of the literary brown Sahibs and I am happy to see the next generation of authors does not suffer from these insecurities.

Smiling disallowed in passport photos

2005-09-15T14:45:00.000-07:00

Apparantly, smiling confuses the bio-metric software used for identifying terrorists. I wonder if frowning should also be discouraged.

read more here

Identifying pets and people

2005-06-24T09:08:00.000-07:00

IT Confidential: Identifying Foreigners, Human And Not -->June 20, 2005

Animals with pet passports avoid six-month quarantines.
By John Soat
Never let it be said that the world of technology isn't chockablock with irony. At the same time that Homeland Security Secretary Michael Chertoff was pushing back plans for the United States to implement a "biometric passport," which will incorporate a radio-frequency identification chip that will hold retinal-scan, fingerprint, and other identifying data in order to check the identities of foreigners visiting the country, a Swiss company said it's prepared to offer the biometric technology required for pets to travel in the European Union.

In an effort to prevent the spread of rabies in Europe, the EU recently mandated the use of permanent identification for dogs, cats, and ferrets traveling between member countries, according to Sokymat, which identifies itself as "the world's leading provider of RFID transponders." Starting last October, traveling pets must bear either a clearly readable tattoo or an electronic ID; in eight years, only the electronic ID system will be valid. Ireland, Malta, and the United Kingdom already require the RFID chips. A pet's ID number and vaccination history are then recorded in a "pet passport," which travels with the feline or pooch. One significant difference between the EU's plan for pets and the United States' plan for visiting foreigners: For human tourists, RFID chips are embedded in their passports; for pets, it's in their bodies.

Lodi - Guns and Roses update

2005-06-20T11:38:00.000-07:00

I attended a wedding at Lodi, at a B&B called Wine & Roses. It was an eclectic Californian wedding with dedication to redwood trees printed on recycled paper, Jane's addiction melodies played as the bridesmaids walked in and the vows were based on Apache songs and excerpts from Khalil Gibran. I met a debonair Pakistani-American gentleman whose illiterate father came to California in 1930's and married an American. The real estate developer went to school in Abottabad Public School in Pakistam between 1965-1969. He was very well mannered and reminded me of an Uncle of mine, we shared a delightful conversation, as his American wife watched him adoringly. It was a timely reminder on the history of the Pakistani community in Central valley.

Later I went to the local Mosque on Poplar Avenue in Lodi. The front door was barred. Around the back, I was followed in by a journalist with a goatee, a photographer’s half sleeve jacket and a couple of telephoto cameras. Inside random Shalwar adorned and bearded Pakistani lounged around. One of them asked, Can I help you, I said I am here to pray. One white bearded gentleman asked me if he could advise me. I said sure. ‘Please roll up my jeans as that is Sunnat.’
I replied with a tad bit of impunity . . 'Kaka, at least let me do wuzu first before you correct me'.
Two nafils later, I am chatting with them and over listening to the stern faced journalist question Kaka. He asked Kaka's last name and when he came to US. It amused him, ‘A girl was fishing in Sacramento River and she pulled me out'.

The journalist did not smile; he was investigating a scuffle that happened in the mosque last week. Finally I get Kaka to myself and I put on my best behaviour.

Kaka founded this mosque in 1983. He came to the US in 1957 from Attock in Pakistan. He came to NY, did not like it and settled in Sacramento valley and supplied farm contract labor for years.
'I use to own a lot of land in Lodi, all of which is developed as strip malls and hotels. I came here in 1957 by chance. I was a Policeman in Peshawar and some men came to obtain a bicycle permit, I helped them get it. They used to work in American consulate; this is when US had an Air Force base in Peshawar. They asked me for my name and a month later, I had a visa for America.'

What about Hyat Khan and his son arrested for terrorism charges?

'All contrived. His son grew up here, he just went to Pakistan to a JUI run seminary to hifz (memorize) the Quran. This is plain to us; none of them are involved in terrorist activity. There only crime is that when questioned, he lied to FBI if he had been to a madarsah in Pakistan, because he was afraid'

I said that this is post 911 hysteria. They will go after any Muslim given flimsy evidence.

'But this is not done by any American. There is politics in the mosque. We Pakistanis are responsible. The current President, he first informed the FBI against the old Imam and said he had over stayed his visa. We are also sure that he is the one who went to the FBI with the story of his son going to a Madarsah in Pakistan. Petty politics. Of course once you give a straw to FBI they will make a thousand bales out of it. That is why their was a scuffle in the mosque here last week, and the journalist was around asking questions'

I did not wait for Zuhr prayers, I was disgusted by the pettiness of Pakistani community as well as they incredible lax journalism. I have long ago stopped being disappointed by the investigative authorities of this country.

Terrorism case in Lodi begins to unravel

2005-06-17T08:43:00.000-07:00

I love being right, and yes I am off to Lodi.....

Terrorism case in Lodi, California begins to unravel
By Patrick Martin11 June 2005

Within days of the June 5 arrest of two Lodi, California men supposedly linked to Islamic fundamentalist terrorism, the case has begun to come apart at the seams.

Attorneys for the two men, a Pakistani immigrant and his US-born son, announced Thursday that there were significant discrepancies in the affidavits used by the federal Department of Justice to charge their clients.

The affidavit released to the news media on June 7 said that the younger man, 23-year-old Hamid Hayat, had attended a terror-training camp in Pakistan along with hundreds of other would-be terrorists, and returned to the US intending that potential targets for attack would include hospitals and large food stores

Neither allegation, however, was in the affidavit actually filed with a federal court in Sacramento thesame day. Instead, the two men were charged only with lying to federal investigators about Hamid Hayat's itinerary during a recent visit to Pakistan

Ghazis and pur-israar banday

2005-06-10T12:27:00.000-07:00

yeh Ghazi yeh teray pur-israar banday

jinhain tou nay bakhsha hay zouq-e-khudaii

do neem inn ki thokar pae sehra-o-darya

simat kar pahar in ki haibat sae rayi

I remember this poetic power couplet from Dr. Allama Iqbal as I found out that a co-worker by the name of M Ghazi had been detained by the FBI for threatening to bomb an Amtrak train in Sacramento. The poor chap’s last name means warrior, I never met him, although we are both Pakistani’s. Another desi told me that he has poor English and looks distraught. He was a programmer working as a contractor. Yesterday he came down to our floor looking for left over ice cream cake and I saw him as a disheveled and paranoid desi H-1 contractor.

A Swiss co-worker told me that he is not a very logical programmer and that he can’t believe that he is capable of anything except muttering, yes he does mutter. The reports have failed to mention that he wears a hearing device, yes, the guy is half deaf!

This all happened June 8th, and later I heard other rumors about his erratic behavior, like he once tried to kiss a girl on the Amtrak train, I am surprised strippers from the big tomato have not come up with stories about how during a particularly sweaty lap dance he promised them Male hoors (complimentary to the fabled 72 virgins of paradise, known as Ghulams . . . who says Islam did not give females equal rights)

And now snippets of the news

FBI questions man as bomb squad examines suspicious packages on train

The man, described only as Middle Eastern and in his mid-30s, attracted the attention of Amtrak conductors when he missed his stop in Martinez, according to Lt. Mark Gagan. The man, who was riding Capitol Corridor train No. 525, reportedly became "nervous'' and "agitated.''

When approached by train conductors, the man allegedly told them that the train would "fall into the sea'' and "disappear,'' Gagan reported. The man then began "chanting and praying in a foreign language,'' Gagan said. The officer said an initial X-ray of one package the man left revealed an electronic device consistent with a bomb, but it turned out to be a laptop computer.

Chalo Chalo Lodi Chalo

2005-06-08T12:37:00.000-07:00

From Lodi, heart of Northern California farming country, where a Pakistani father (ice cream seller) and 21 year old son were arrested on terrorism charges. After the initial flurry of terrorist activites, it turns out that the FBI has actually filed much lesser charges (lied about his ittenary in Pakistan) in the court of law then they gave to the newsworth news organizations (trained at Al Kaeeda camps).

FBI: Al Qaeda plot possibly uncovered

LODI, California (CNN) -- Authorities said Wednesday they believe a father and son arrested in this quaint northern California community were involved in a larger al Qaeda plan to carry out jihad, or holy war, against the United States. He said those included "individuals who have received terrorist training abroad, with the specific intent to initiate a terrorist attack in the United States and to harm Americans and our institutions."

Authorities earlier this week arrested the father and son, identified as 47-year-old Umer Hayat and 22-year-old Hamid Hayat from Lodi, on charges they lied to FBI investigators. The son is to be arraigned Friday.

Terror allegations disappear from court filing: Different affidavit in Lodi father-son case given to media than used for court.

By Tom Regan csmonitor.com

The Los Angeles Times reports that the Federal Bureau of Invesigation apparently gave the media a different, far more damaging version of an affidavit against a Lodi, California father and son charged with lying to federal officials than the one that was finally given to a court in Sacramento Thursday.

Consternation over alleged Lodi terror connection
DON THOMPSON

LODI, Calif. - For nearly a century, Pakistani-Amercians have been part of the flavor of this small agricultural community.Umer Hayat cheerfully sold treats to children from his battered ice cream van and his son, Hamid, packed cherries grown in the surrounding orchards. And it's here that authorities say 22-year-old Hamid Hayat returned last year after training in an al-Qaida terrorist camp, with plans to attack hospitals and supermarkets in the United States.

Muslim murderers among us : FBI raids Lodi

Imam - son & 2 others plotted to blow up supermarkets and hospitals - update
Imam's US born son trained at Al Qaeda camp in Pakistan - " to learn how to kill Americans" used pictures of president Bush as targets

Chaudry BU5H on Propaganda

2005-05-26T13:43:00.000-07:00

Our president on his proposed revisions to social security:

" Now, a personal savings account would be a part of a
Social Security retirement system. It would be a part
of what you would have to retire when you reach
retirement age. As you -- as I mentioned to you earlier,
we're going to redesign the current system.

If you've retired, you don't have anything to worry
about -- third time I've said that. (Laughter.)
I'll probably say it three more times. See, in my
line of work you got to keep repeating things over
and over and over again for the truth to sink in,
to kind of catapult the propaganda."

Gotta love it.

Khan Sahab has Landed - OPEN Conference

2005-05-21T15:03:00.000-07:00

I attended the OPEN conference on the ‘The Art of Leadership’ at the beautiful and secluded Palo Alto campus of SAP, the German company that invented ERP (Enterprise Resource Planning). Open stands for Organization of Pakistani Entrepreneurs in North America.

At arrival the pretty Pakistani at the check –in announced in a hushed tone over the phone ‘Khan Sahib has landed’. The Open membership and the forum cost me $85. Usually I would balk at this expense but aside from the fact that this was a gathering of the most important Pakistani’s in Silicon Valley and subsequently North America and a legitimate target for any incendiary device to be set by an insidious organization working against Pakistan, we also had our beloved Immi their.

After meeting with many friends and partaking in a sumptuous lunch provided by Mehran restaurant, I argued with an India Muslim about cricket. He said Miadad was a ‘domestic bully’, he proved his point with random stats. I told him I believe in thin slicing, I don’t think he got the point.

However, we all waited with baited breaths to hear Imran Khan, Captain of World Cup wining Pakistan cricket team, a world class cricketer, Philanthropist, Playboy, and Politician.

I have long been a fan of Imran Khan. I have seen him perform on the field and off the field. He thumbed his nose at Ian Botham, partied with Lady Diana, came out of his arrogant stage and became a Che for Pakistan. I have written articles on his quest for leadership. He has never been a very talented speaker, but this time I could clearly tell that he has been trained. He was a warrior, he swept the audience and he was better then Tim Robbins.

I listened to the speech in a horse-stand, the my inner chi threatening to explode as I stood their riveted (not an easy task as I suffer from ADHD). He made us laugh and proud, he made references to brown sahib complex, the elitist schooling, his battles on and off field, and the power to never compromise on your dreams.

‘Always keep your vision ahead of you, never compromise, I could have been a good medium pacer but I wanted to be the best fass bowler in cricket, I could have build a General hospital but I wanted a Cancer hospital, I could have been Prime Minister , but I wanted to change the system from grounds up.’

Imran said one thing that really stuck me, ‘The worst thing about colonialism is that it makes one detest oneself’ How true.

After him there were some other people. We heard Mr.Owais Leghari, the 31 yr old IT minister. He was unimpressive as he reminded me of the power structures and sycophancy in Pakistan.

‘Pakistan does not need any more investment, we need trust…. Aitcheson is not an elitist school’

I really wanted to ask him about his graduation from Rochester University, when the Pakistani Air force One came with his father then the president of Pakistan Farooq Leghari and eighty of his closest relatives to New York, Las Vegas and Los Angeles from Pakistan. All on tax payers money. But his power is base on the achievement and deals of his father. Someone else comes to mind, but I can’t quite Bust it out.

I have been a fan of Imran for ages. Here is an excerpt of an article I wrote ten years back when Imran Khan announced his candidacy for a member of National assembly.

“ Driving home from work, listening to NPR, I heard about a third force in UK politics, a pressure group, orchestrated by Sir James Goldsmith, a.k.a Goldifnger. On the backdrop of the musical score from the James Bond movie "Goldfinger", Robert Seagull, the NPR newscaster, explained the eccentricities of this Anglo-French, Jewish millionaire, who has a mansion build in the jungles of Mexico, with armed guards and electric fences, all in the style of Ian Flemings villains. The ruthless millionaire, famous in America as a corporate raider, is internationally known for his cunning moves, especially the one which involved the conversion of all his stocks and shares into gold, just before the great stock market crash on "Black Monday". Sir James Goldsmith has also written a book on GATT. His point of view being that GATT will force under-developed countries to live by the laws of developed ones, especially in the new Intellectual Property Rights andthe Patents law, which banned reverse engineering on patents.

Which all make sense, or does it? …. Maybe GATT got rid of some loopholes that he profited. The enigma remains and is made more complex by the marriage of his daughter to Mr. Imran Khan, himself the political center of Pakistan politics at this time, and creator of the much publicized 'pressure group' or 'third force'. Incidentally, NPR used the same two words, third force and pressure group to describe Sir James Goldsmith campaign, without mentioning the significance of these words inPakistani politics.

So is there a connection or am I hallucinating from the stench of molasses as I make my way past the grain factories on the Mississippi river. Is the father-in-law impressed by his son-in-law.”

Working within the system

2005-04-21T13:47:00.000-07:00

Its like we never get cute Muslim shit! So here is a
funny parable.

peace y'all.

Working within the system.

An old Arab lived close to New York City for more than
40 years. He would have loved to plant
potatoes in his garden, but he is alone, old and weak.
His son is in college in Paris, so the old
man sends him an e-mail. He explains the problem:

"Beloved son, I am very sad, because I can't plant
potatoes in my garden. I am sure, if only you
were here, you would help and dig up the garden for
me.
I love you, Your Father"

The following day, the old man receives a response
e-mail from his son:

"Beloved Father, Please don't touch the garden. It's
there that I have hidden 'the THING'. I love you, too,
Ahmed"

At 4pm the US Army, The Marines, the FBI, the CIA and
the Rangers visit the house of the old
man, take the whole garden apart, search every inch,
but can't find anything. Disappointed they
leave the house.

A day later, the old man receives another e-mail from
his son.

"Beloved Father,
I hope the garden is dug up by now and you can plant
your potatoes. That's all I could do for you from
here.
I love you, Ahmed."

Layla and Majnun

2005-02-25T13:49:00.000-08:00

The story of "Layla and Majnun" is one of the best known legends of the Orient, both a touching love story and a profound spiritual allegory. Nizami collected a number of folk versions and shaped them into a single narrative poem of some 4,000 stanzas near the end of the twelfth century. The Sufis consider Nizami's "Layla and Majnun" an important parable of religious experience. Majnun, through his great love for Layla, is able to transcend individual identity and becomes the Beloved.

The most popular version of this love story "Leyli and Majnun" was penned by Nizami Ganjavi (1141-1209), who lived and died in Ganja, an ancient city in Azerbaijan where his shrine stands today. He wrote in Persian as was the literary custom of the day though few Persians today grant that Nizami was of Azeri ethnicity. Eric Clapton's famous song Layla was inspired by this legend.

From 12th Century Persia, the ending of the famous epic of unrequited love.

These two friends are one, eternal companions.
He is Majnun,
the king of the world in right action.
And she is Layla,
the moon among idols in compassion.

In the world, like unpierced rubies
They treasured their fidelity
Affectionately,
But found no rest
And could not attain their heart's desire.

Here they suffer grief no more.
So it will be until eternity.
Whoever endures suffering
And forebears in that world
Will be joyous and exalted in this world.

Whoever would find a place in that world
Must tread on the lusts of this world.
This world is dust
And is perishable.
That world is pure and eternal. . . .

Commit yourself to love's sanctuary and at once
Find freedom from your ego.
Fly in love as an arrow towards its target.
Love loosens the knots of being,
Love is liberation from the vortex of egotism.

In love, every cup of sorrow which bites
into the soul gives it new life.
Many a draft bitter as poison has become
in love delicious...
However agonizing the experience,
If it is for love it is well.

Sex and Torture @ Gitmo

2005-01-25T13:55:00.000-08:00

Wow . .  maybe the next 24 hour episode should be on
this, but I am waiting to see the HBO version starring
Angela Jolie. Actually, it is sad but true.

Revealed: sex and torture inside the wire
January 28, 2005 - 1:58PM

Female interrogators tried to break Muslim detainees
at Guantanamo Bay by sexual touching, wearing a
miniskirt and thong underwear and in one case smearing
a Saudi man's face with fake menstrual blood,
according to an insider's written account.

A draft manuscript obtained by The Associated Press is
classified as secret pending a Pentagon review for a
planned book that details ways the US military used
women as part of tougher physical and psychological
interrogation tactics to get terror suspects to talk.

The book, which Saar titled Inside the Wire, is due
out this year with Penguin Press.

Killing us softly

2005-01-23T14:28:00.000-08:00

YES, Parveen Babi is dead. All hail the sexy siren. So
so awesome in Dewar, Shaan, Amar Akbar Anthony, Qurbani,
Kaalia . . . She was related to the Nawab of Junagar, she converted from
Islam to Catholicism. Among her lovers were

Danny Dezongpa
Amitabh
Kabir bedi

Bollywood star Parveen Babi dies

Parveen Babi was a glamourous style icon of the 1970s

Bollywood actress Parveen Babi has been found dead at her home in Mumbai (Bombay).

Police discovered her body after breaking into her apartment, where she lived alone. She appeared to have died of natural causes.

Babi starred in more than 50 Hindi films including 1975's Deewaar.

On film she came to represent the bohemian Indian woman, unafraid to smoke or drink on camera at a time when these were considered taboo.

'Dr Jones' is Dead

2005-01-12T14:18:00.000-08:00

Veteran actor Amrish Puri is no more. Most people recall him as the Crazy priest Mola Ram (nice Hindu-Muslim name for introverted and geo politically stupid Hollywood script writers) in Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom. His dialogue that sent chills up the audience spines (as well as monkey brain eating Hindus - most Indians are vegetarian, another brilliant example of Spielberg’s adventure script writing).

His rise to fame was as Mogambo in Mr. India. As a megalomaniac baldy he was famous for saying 'Mogambo Khush huwa'. My sis liked him as a cruel father in some cheesy Bollywood domestic drama called Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge (Big Hearts Will Win Their Brides.... yes they really are this stupid)

My favorite role for Amrish Puri remains as the villain J.K in Shakti. The film billed as clash of titans in 1982. I like to call it the last great Bollywood movie made, the downhill spiral started after that. It featured Dilip kumar and Amitab Bachan as estranged Father and Son.He made many cheesy Bollywood movies, sometimes he would have long hair, sometimes he would be dressed up as a Sufi saint as in Shaheed Udam Singh. He played loud, crude and obnoxious characters and enjoyed playing a villain. My personal favorite line from one of the greatest screen villains remains

'Black Dog pee kai meray under ka kala kuta bhonknay lagta hai'

'Drinking Black Dog (whiskey) makes my inner black dog howls'

Bollywood star Amrish Puri dies

Puri acted in Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom

Veteran Bollywood actor, Amrish Puri, has died at the age of 72 in Mumbai (Bombay) from a brain haemorrhage.

Puri was best known for playing the role of a villain in more than 200 Bollywood films spread over more than three decades

An Inspiration to us all - Abdus Sattar Edhi

2005-01-05T20:29:00.000-08:00

This guys should have been on a short list for a Nobel peace Prize, but he keeps getting over looked, but not just by the Zionist conspiracy (which seems to run the world in the eyes of Muslims), but by Pakistanis as well. Is he up there with Dalia Lama, I would think so, but if not Nobel Prize can he be at least in an Apple Billboard?

I saw an exhibition in Stanford called Faces of Inspiration. They had Mother Teresa, Gandhi, Dalia Lama, and other peace visionary, but no Sattar Edhi. I wonder when I am going to see him on Hwy 101?

An Inspiration for Pakistanis
By Ras H. Siddiqui

One can ignore numerous people in Pakistan from a journalist’s viewpoint. But when it comes to the keepers of the welfare of literally thousands of citizens of a relatively poor country (by many standards) no visitor to Karachi at least can forget the presence of Abdul Sattar Edhi and his wife Bilquis. Thus my recent trip to our country of origin would not have been complete without a meeting with Mr. Edhi and I made it a point to try and locate him at Kharadar (Salty Gate) or Mithadar (Sweet Gate), some of the most overcrowded and hard to reach parts of Pakistan’s largest city.